A Tale of Two Cities
by Firefall Bangenthump
Summary: Roddy and Rita find themselves trapped in a forgotten city after getting lost in the pipes. A plan is devised to bring them home, but there's a problem- they'll have to bring the entire city with them, and the plan puts Ratropolis itself in danger.
1. Chapter 1

_Flushed Away _is, of course, the creation and property of Aardman-type people and DreamWorksy folks. But you know this.

This co-written story was the idea of the inestimable DragonTamer222 of _The Great Ruby Chase_ fame and therefore any credit should go to her. Blame for bad bits can probably come to me since the odds are that I wrote them. There are little bits of _The Great Ruby Chase_ as well as the _Changes of Scene_ in here, so anyone confused can easily rememdy it by taking a look at those.

Apologies for the formatting of this chapter. I know it looks like a mess, but trust me, after this it gets better!

**Chapter One: A Day in the Pipes**

Rita sighed softly as she steered the Jammy Dodger II through the sewer waters. It was a quiet day, nothing really exciting happened, aside from the fact that Roddy had learned a new song and was now strumming it on a makeshift guitar he made out of a few pieces of twine over a miniature drum. The sound of it was music to her ears, literally, yet sometimes an irritating 'twang' would sound out, breaking the melodious tune.

"You really need to practice a bit more if you're going to do that right." She muttered as she turned her head towards him, seeing a playful grin crossing his face, "It sounds nice at some points, but then again it can get horrid fast."

She saw him put away the guitar and he stood up in order to walk up to the cabin, "Well, if we don't get any excitement soon, I'll be able to play a few guitar pieces at once." He turned his head and gazed out at the slow moving river, "Where exactly are we going, anyway?"

Rita shrugged, "Well, I'm not entirely sure. I'm just going wherever the river takes me…" as she sped the Dodger up a bit, she laughed, "It's not taking us very far on its own though, so we might as well help it out."

"Good, because you're not usually one to just go with the flow," said Roddy. He cast an eye back to the locker where he had stowed the guitar. "Go with the flow...that might make a good lyric..."  
"Do not," said Rita, firmly. "Even think about it. What was that piece you started playing though? It was...well..." She struggled not to deliver an unmitigated compliment. "Not as bad as the others."  
Roddy scratched his head. "You mean the Bach?"  
"I thought it was the front," quipped Rita. Roddy rolled his eyes.  
"A small amount of respect for one of the greatest composers of all time wouldn't kill you, you know. Especially when you've got one on your own boat."  
"In that case I want you to find him and give him the guitar," said Rita.  
Roddy laughed. "It was a Bach piece. One of my favourites."  
"I liked it too," said Rita. "What's it called? Why do you like it?"  
"It's called 'Air on a G-String,'" said Roddy. "Which is not unconnected to the reason I like it. Would you care to hear it again?"  
"Make one move towards that locker and I'll break the guitar over your head, remove the G-string and garrotte you with it." There was a smile playing around her lips towards the end of the elaborate threat.  
"Not if I get there first, Captain," said Roddy, with cheerful emphasis on the last word.  
"You think you're faster than me?" Rita turned to him and cocked an eyebrow.  
Roddy shook his head. "Not so much. I know I'm faster than you, Rita."  
She locked the wheel into autopilot- a bent coat hanger inserted through a hole in the disc to prevent it from turning by itself. "And what makes you think that, Roddy?" she said, shifting subtly into a racing stance.  
"Well...a couple of things." Roddy shrugged. "Such as the fact that you'll need to spend a couple of seconds getting up, by which time-"  
He moved faster than Rita suspected he could. One of her legs was swiftly booted out from under her and she dropped onto the deck with a surprised yelp. Roddy flashed her a cocky salute and darted over to the locker.  
"...by which time," he went on, "I'll be over here." He watched as his captain picked herself up again and reached for the nearest weapon.  
"Oh, very funny, Roddy," said Rita, trying not to laugh out loud. "Very funny. I'm going to remember that one!"  
"So will I," said Roddy, strumming a couple of chords casually. "In fact, I'm inspired to write a song about it. I think a suitable title would be 'Another One Bites The Dust'."  
Rita laughed and threw herself at him. The guitar clattered to the deck as she bore him to the ground and landed heavily on top of him. Roddy struggled against her for a moment until she pinned him to the ground with the weapon she had grabbed from the cockpit.  
"Uh...what exactly is that you've got there?" Roddy tried to look at his own ear.  
Rita sat up and waved the bent coathanger. "The first thing that came to hand."  
Roddy peered at it. "Isn't that the autopilot? Shouldn't that be doing something right about now?"  
Rita stood and helped him up. "It shouldn't matter too much. The current here is weak anyway."  
She went back to the cockpit. Roddy re-stowed the guitar and joined her, dusting himself off.  
"Well, maybe here it is," he said. "But what about up ahead?"  
Rita paused before replying. Roddy's ears were slightly better than hers, but now she could hear it as well. Above the sound of the engine, there was the unmistakable hissing roar of white waters.  
"Oh, great...Roddy, take hold of anything that we have loose in the boat! If we're where I think we are, then we're in for some rough waters."  
At her orders, Roddy began to grab anything within view that might prove as a hazard to a ship fighting against the waters, including the guitar which he had dropped.  
Rita quickly grabbed the wheel of the ship and cranked it to the left to prevent the tip of the boat from smashing into the wall. The hull scraped slightly against the sides, but it didn't cause too much damage, so the captain righted the boat and continued to navigate the ship through the treacherous waters.  
When Roddy threw the last of the items to safety into the engine room, he ran up to his companion and looked around, "This place is oddly familiar..." he murmured while gazing around at their surroundings. What was familiar were the multiple roots that snaked out of the walls, each one winding around pipes as if they were frozen serpents.  
"That's because we were here not too long ago." Rita shouted over the rapids as she cranked the throttle to its fullest power, "This is where we lost the first Dodger, and this is the way it is to the humans' world Up Top!"  
Roddy sighed, that was just their luck...The first time they came here was in desperation for him to get home, and it was at a great loss on Rita's part. But as he watched her steering the second ship, frowning in concentration, he knew she would get them safely through.  
The rapids seemed to get rougher as the Jammy Dodger II cut through the water like a hot knife through butter. Rita's arms ached as she tried to keep the wheel steady, and beads of sweat ran down her face, but she fought as hard as she could. As the water turned off into the grate which led to the treatment plant, Rita grunted softly as she turned the wheel in the other direction, and was rewarded as the front of the ship met the calmer waters. Roddy shouted out happily as the turbine of the boat left the current, causing the ship to float calmly through the gentle river.  
"Well, that could have been worse," said Rita, trying not to let her voice betray the nerves she had felt.  
"You mean that couldn't have been better!" said Roddy enthusiastically. "Brilliant piloting, Rita! In fact, if I may say so..." He moved next to her and put a patronising arm around her shoulders. "I probably couldn't have done it better myself."  
Rita gave him a wry look. "Only probably? You were driving the last time we were in these parts and what happened then? Oh, wait, wait...it's coming back to me, what's this boat called again..." She rolled her eyes skywards and tapped her chin as if in deep thought. Roddy sighed.  
"That's not a totally unfair point."  
"I don't think it's unfair at all," said Rita, patting his cheek happily. "Check below to see if anything's broken loose. The last thing we need is something knocking around where we can't see it."  
"Heaven forbid," muttered Roddy. "Aye, ma'am!" He turned and made his way down the ladder into the engine room. He greeted the sight there with a groan loud enough to attract Rita's attention.  
"Problem, Roddy?"

She stood at the hatchway and peered down at him.  
"Only in the broadest sense...it's like Dresden down here only not on fire." He cast a despairing look around the room. The cupboards and lockers lining the walls had not been designed for the kind of kicking the Hyde Park Rapids could inflict. Their contents lay scattered around the room like cast confetti.  
"Well, I guess I didn't have anything better to do today." Roddy picked up a matchbox marked SPARE PARTS and gave a resigned sigh when the tray slid out and scattered a dozen silver nuts across the floor. "Do you think it's possible I offended the Goddess of Chaos with my music earlier? I get the feeling that this is going to be one of those days."  
Rita took pity on him. "Hang about. I'll stow the boat and give you a hand. It looks like everything's shifted and I don't want anything getting into the engine."

* * *

Rita did as she said and pulled the Jammy Dodger II to the side of the river so as to avoid any further troubles. Then, she walked back down and noticed that Roddy was already working, picking up each metal nut delicately before he placed it into the box.  
"If you keep working like that, it'll take us hours to clean it up." she laughed and leapt down the hatch, landing lightly upon her feet, "Well, we probably should have realized this was going to happen. Let's just see what we can do about this."  
Rita started to place a few discarded items, such as cans of food and tools, into a locker. She tried to not be too messy, but even as she looked at it, they looked a bit jumbled. "Was it like this before?" she asked, letting a nervous chuckle escape from her lips, "I don't even remember what was in this compartment."  
Roddy tried fighting off a smart comment, but found it impossible to, "Granted, your organizational skills are lacking, but shouldn't you at least know where everything is on your ship?"  
Rita elbowed him playfully, "Hey, that's your job, First Mate." she emphasized the last two words and picked up a dented guitar and couldn't help but smile, "Well, might as well put the cause of all of this away, we don't want any more trouble with the Goddess of Chaos, now would we?"  
"Not when I'm on a boat being skippered by her closest living relative," said Roddy, kicking aside a pile of canvas in order to clear a path to a distant locker. "Maybe we should dump some of this stuff? I mean, even you don't know what it's all for."  
"No, but you never know," said Rita, stowing the guitar, "With-"  
"'With particular emphasis on the 'you'" said Roddy, rolling his eyes and attempting to imitate her lower-London accent. "You need some new material. I've heard that one so often that I've stopped even pretending to take offence."  
"You know me too well," said Rita grinning.  
"I would hardly think that's possible," replied Roddy, wedging the locker shut with his shoulder. "Thanks for the help. I'll clear the rest of it away and stow it in alphabetical order to help you remember where it all belongs." He paused and looked around the engine room with a pensive expression.  
"You're having second thoughts about that idea?" said Rita.  
"Not exactly...just...that plan rather relies on you knowing the alphabet..." He waggled a hand.  
She threw an oily rag at him, leaving a dark smudge on his white shirt. Laughing, Roddy picked it up and threw it back but Rita was already halfway up the ladder. Roddy gave chase but she was too fast. Rita rolled out onto the deck commando-style and slammed the hatch shut behind her just as Roddy came through it. There was a solid-sounding thump and a muffled curse. She opened the hatch a crack and saw Roddy lying at the bottom of the ladder, rubbing his head and wondering what had just hit him.  
"Sorry about that," she said with genuine contrition. "Are you all right? I didn't mean to get you."  
"I'm all right," said Roddy, sitting up. "I probably deserved that after the trick I pulled earlier."  
"It's a good thing you've got a thick head, Roddy," said Rita, smiling with relief.  
"It was bound to come in handy sooner or later," Roddy gave her a small salute. 

Rita laughed and shook her head before leaping down into the engine room. She always enjoyed coming down here. It always felt like being in the old Dodger, mostly because of the disorder within.  
Roddy was currently pacing around the room, looking around at the lockers and cabinets.

"Well," he said as he peered at one shelf. He turned to Rita and cocked an eyebrow. "Where are we going now, skipper?"  
Rita looked up at the open hatch and grinned. "If memory serves, I still owe you one trip to Kensington which doesn't involve losing the boat along the way."

"There's still time for that, Captain," said Roddy, poker-faced. "And we've already been back there, remember?"

Rita did, and hoped that she hadn't offended him with the suggestion. "Of course. Sorry. I guess it's a big sewer, though. Plenty to see and do. Besides, it isn't as if we can just turn around and go back now."  
As the two reached the deck of the boat, Rita shut the hatch and walked up to the steering wheel, "Well, let's get going, then." she said with a grin, "Here goes nothing."  
Pushing the lever to full throttle, Rita took the phone dial in her hand and the boat surged forward through the water.

* * *

Roddy watched their wake as they moved away from the Hyde Park Treatment Plant.  
"Do you know the way?" he asked Rita.  
She hesitated briefly. "More or less."  
"So...you don't?" Roddy joined her, and grinned. Rita didn't like conceding that her knowledge of the sewers was anything less than encyclopaedic, especially not to Roddy.  
"Well, we lost Dad's maps with the first Dodger," said Rita. "And nobody has ever managed to get past those rapids before."  
"We're pioneers, then? How exciting." Roddy looked down the tunnel. "Just out of interest, how do you know that nobody has ever got past them?"  
Rita looked at him as if he were desperately stupid. "Because nobody's ever come back, genius."  
Roddy frowned. "Oh, I don't doubt it, ma'am! But wouldn't it be possible that they got past, but couldn't get back? The current would be just as strong in the other direction, wouldn't it?"  
"That's...not...impossible, I guess," said Rita, who hadn't looked at it that way before. "Over the years, there'd be quite a few people who might have made it but couldn't get home again. Maybe we aren't pioneers after all."  
"Well, we can always try being the first ones to get back," said Roddy. "Which we can, right? I mean, the Dodger can do it again?"  
Rita patted the wheel fondly. "The Dodger can do anything."  
"Much like myself," said Roddy, affecting an air of graceful arrogance.  
"Ha, well, if you can do anything, why don't you go scrub the side of the ship while I find the way out of here?" Rita said with a teasing smirk.  
"Oh, touché." Roddy replied with a gesture of placing his hand on his heart in mock pain, "Alright, well, maybe I can't do everything…"  
"I thought so." Rita murmured as she continued to steer the boat forward, a bit apprehensive, but feeling adrenaline course through her. The thought of travelling to the world Up Top was beginning to seem like a new adventure to her.  
She began to navigate the Dodger through the calm waters, keeping an eye out for intersections that would lead them elsewhere. As the great ship cut easily through the waters, Rita gazed at the bow in admiration as it slowly bobbed up and down with the flow of the river. She always had to remind herself why she received the ship, and it was because of her companion, who gave up a life of luxury to stay with her in the sewers. She looked back at him now, watching as he strummed a few chords on the guitar that he retrieved from the engine room.  
"Not this again…" she murmured aloud so that her companion could hear. Roddy looked up with an angelic look on her face, one that didn't fully conceal the imaginary horns on his head.  
"I think we should put that away for a while." Rita said as she turned her eyes away to watch the river, "Besides, I need to concentrate, and I can't do it with that noise going on."  
Roddy ran his hand over the guitar one last time, "Aye, aye, captain." he went down below the hatch and disappeared from view, and Rita shook her head softly and took out the mechanical hand before allowing it to rest on the hatch.  
"He's probably going to kill me for this." Rita muttered as she felt a grin sneaking up on her face, "But now he can play however much he wants and it won't bother me."  
Roddy pushed on the hatch once or twice and chuckled to himself. Well, two could play at this game! He put the guitar aside for a moment and went over the engine control panel. His knowledge of mechanics had advanced considerably since his ill-fated attempt at repairing the first Jammy Dodger and it was a simple matter to switch over to the electric motor, powered by the onboard battery pack. He then picked up the instrument again and opened a maintenance hatch in the side of the funnel.

Rita looked around in surprise as she felt the vibration of the main engine stop. She'd checked it this morning! It couldn't possibly have broken down already! But the auxiliary electric motor had kicked in without her telling it to. She looked back to the hatch and considered moving the mechanical arm aside so she could go down and check it out.  
"Noboooody knows...the trouble I've seen..."  
She paused and then shook her head. Roddy's voice, echoing eerily in the metal confines, was emerging from the funnel accompanied by distant, melancholy music.  
"Nobody knows...but Rita..."  
She rapped the knuckles of the mechanical hand on the deck once or twice.  
"Pipe down, will you, Satchmo? If you're going to be playing around down there do you think you could make a start on dinner?" She tried to sound severe, but it took all her effort not to laugh out loud.  
There was a pause before Roddy replied, making full use of the echo-chamber effect the funnel produced.  
"Bewaaaaare, bewaaaaare!" He waved his hands despite the fact that Rita couldn't see them.  
"Your cooking isn't that bad, Roddy!" Rita finally moved the hand aside. She opened the hatch and stuck her head down into the engine room. "And you might want to take her off auxiliary power as well. The last thing I need is the battery pack dying on us."  
Roddy grinned cheekily and shouldered the guitar in a military-style armed salute, flicking the funnel hatch shut with his tail as he did so. "Your wish is my command, ma'am!"  
Rita rolled her eyes. "Maybe a dead battery pack isn't the worst possible outcome after all. You make a start on the food and I'll find somewhere to pull over for the night."

Roddy smiled and threw the guitar aside, "Alright, Captain. Slop in a bowl coming right up!" I just need the ingredients." he reached in a cabinet and Rita cocked an eyebrow, "You won't find much in the oily rag locker, I can tell you that."  
Roddy made a face and pulled his hand away as if the contents within were diseased, "Ew, you never can tell where those rags have been."  
Rita grinned. "I was just kidding, gosh, I'd think that you were the one who knew where everything went. Didn't you just put it in there say..." she pretended to be deep in thought for a moment, "Ten minutes ago?"  
Roddy laughed, "I guess my memory isn't quite the best. It's contagious after a while."  
He narrowly dodged a half of a golf ball that was meant for a bowl, and he rested his hands on his hips and scowled, "Now, now, Rita, how many times have I told you not to throw the utensils we eat off of?"  
Rita laughed and rolled her eyes, "Well, since you haven't fed me yet, I might as well make use of the empty bowls."  
"Okay, okay." Roddy said as he lifted his hands in front of him, "I'll take care of the food, just find us some place nice to stay...well, as nice as you can find in a sewer." he gave a friendly smile.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two: Unexpected Arrivals**

Roddy winced as it happened again.

Rita had found a placid pool in which to tie up. It was underneath a broad metal grate which had afforded them both light and a view of what few stars could be seen from London. Unfortunately it had also turned out to be the centre of a busy road intersection and heavy vehicles would periodically drive overhead, displacing a fine shower of dirt particles and making a noise like thunder. Rita seemed unconcerned.

"When I said, 'find us some place nice to stay', I didn't mean that as a challenge, you know," said Roddy. "There's more dirt in the food now than seasoning."

"There was seasoning?" said Rita, with her mouth full.

Roddy sighed. "Good cooking really is wasted on you isn't it?"

"There was no seasoning, was there?" Rita grinned.

"Actually, no. Which means there is definitely more dirt in it." Roddy brushed some out of his hair. "Next time, I'll pick the bivouac, all right?"

"You don't like it here?" Rita sat back, not even trying to disguise the enjoyment she was getting out of Roddy's discomfort.

He flinched again. "Of course I do, Rita, it's tip-top. I'm just not sure about the wallpaper."

Her grin widened. He sighed again.

"Well, at least you've stopped throwing things at me."

"Only because I'm using them right now," said Rita. "Anyway, there's a few other things I could throw at you that are lying around pointlessly."

"Are you offering to throw yourself at me?" said Roddy, raising his eyebrows cheerfully. "Lying around pointlessly as you-"

He ducked as a particularly large truck roared overhead.

"As you...are..." he finished lamely. "Can we possibly find somewhere else to sleep? I don't think anyone could relax with that racket happening."

"What racket?" said Rita, sweetly. "Alright, alright. Gosh, where's your sense of humour now?"

She started up the boat, "Besides, I'm used to this kind of thing. If you want to be a great first mate, you're going to have to be able to sleep under any conditions, and sleep lightly at that." she winked back at him and allowed the boat to slowly tread through the water to their next destination. As they drew further in a darkened tunnel, the sounds of the traffic faded behind. "Roddy..."  
"Hmm?" he asked as he looked towards where the sound came from. It was nearly pitch black in the tunnel, but the lamp that hung over the back of the boat cast a faint light around them.  
Rita motioned towards his assigned couch in the back of the boat, "You can get to sleep. It may take me a while to find a place to stay, and I'm sure you need your rest."  
Roddy looked at the couch and felt his eyes drooping from sleepiness. He nodded and sighed, "A long day of playing music, being tossed around by a raging river of death, and putting everything away afterwards has really taken it out of me. He turned his eyes towards her, "Are you sure you don't want me to wait until we pull over?"  
Rita nodded and waved him on, "Yeah, I'm sure. I'll sleep in a bit." she crossed her fingers in front of her so he wouldn't see.  
Roddy seemed to hesitate for a second, but then he shrugged and went over to the couch. He laid down upon it, and Rita hummed the song he was singing just before. She groaned and smacked herself in the head, which caused Roddy to lift his head, smile, and say, "I got it stuck."  
Rita shook her head, trying hard not to smile, "Great, and I thought the slugs were bad enough."  
Roddy yawned and turned towards the wall of the boat, "Well, I'm used to it, if you want me to be your first mate, then you'll have to be able to withstand my singing."  
"Heaven forbid." Rita murmured, loud enough so he could hear, before she continued to steer the boat. She sighed, it was going to be a long night, but she knew they had to get Up Top soon. She wasn't worried about getting there, she was worried about getting back...

* * *

When Roddy awoke, there was already sunlight streaming through the grates overhead. He sat up with a start and rubbed his eyes. He'd been asleep all night! What was Rita thinking? He looked at the cockpit and shook his head. Rita was still standing at the wheel.  
"Rita?"  
"Morning, Roddy," said Rita, but there had been a small but significant pause before her head came up to answer and the words came too quickly. She must have been on the verge of drifting off herself. Roddy swung his legs out of bed and went to the cockpit.  
"Are you all right? Please tell me you weren't standing here all night long."  
"I wasn't standing here all night long," said Rita.  
"Liar," said Roddy.  
"You're hard to please this morning, aren't you?" Rita gave him a grin. "Look, don't worry about me. I've gone longer without sleep than this."  
"Well, yes...but..." Roddy sighed. "If you're planning on doing it, at least let me know. I'm not as useless as you think I am, you know, I can get by without rest if I have to. You need your beauty sleep, Rita. As much of it as you can get."  
"Such insubordination!" Rita raised an eyebrow. "That sort of thing can get a First Mate in a lot of trouble. You're lucky I don't have a yardarm for you to swing from."  
Roddy shrugged. "I'm lucky in all sorts of ways. Seriously, though. We're a crew, which means we work together, right? Wake me up next time. That's all I'm saying."  
Rita looked him over and sighed inwardly. He was right, which made it harder. But she'd let him sleep so he couldn't see her unease and she wasn't about to admit to that.  
"Fine. Next time I decide to pull an all-nighter I'll definitely let you know so you can see for yourself what a non-event it is."  
"I look forward to it," said Roddy, happily. "I'll get started on breakfast, shall I? Would you prefer cinnamon bread or French toast?"  
Rita looked at him in surprise. "Well...the cinnamon sounds good. Do we actually have either of those things?"  
"No," said Roddy, grinning. "I just wondered which you'd prefer. Didn't say we had any."  
"Oh, very funny, Roddy." Rita shook her head and returned her gaze to the water ahead of them.  
"I'm glad you think so, Captain," said Roddy. He flipped her a salute and left the cockpit, whistling a tune.

Rita rolled her eyes and turned back to look through the tunnel. The water that sloshed around the bottom of the boat seemed to get louder and more irritating. She tried to slow the boat down, a slight pain was forming behind her forehead, but the sound continued, getting louder as the boat travelled further down the tunnel.  
It was then that she saw a light at the end of the tunnel.  
"Subtle..." she murmured as she felt the Dodger jerk about through the rougher waters, "Roddy, you might want to hang onto something, I think we're about to have quite a ride."  
"What was that?" Roddy asked as he stuck his head out of the hatch for the engine room, "I can't hear you over this tumultuous water."  
"Ha ha ha." Rita did her best to unmask her sarcastic tone and grasped tightly to the steering wheel of the ship, "Just brace yourself, I don't want to be fishing you out of the water, from what I remember from a slug rumor, you're not the best swimmer."  
A hint of red came to her companions cheeks, and she nervously cleared her throat, "Well, anyway, like I said, you better hang on. I'm sure that wherever this tunnel leads, it's not going to be easy."  
Roddy nodded, and went down below. Rita watched him going and sighed. She knew that the tunnel most likely was a pipe that led to a river or lake. What she didn't know was how high it was...she prayed that the _Jammy Dodger II_ will survive the fall and land belly-down.

Rita was not one to simply sit back and let fate deal its cards. When it came to matters of personal survival, she had no compunction about spiking the deck a little, or, if it came to it, kicking over the table and beating an escape through the window. As irritating as the water in the bilges was, it might yet save them. She span a small brass handle, opening the seacocks and allowing water to flow into the _Jammy Dodger_ II's bilges. It sank noticeably in the water before she span the wheel shut again.  
"I'm not sure if this is one of those things I should be alarmed about," called Roddy from below, "But there's rather more water below the deck than there used to be."  
"I know, don't worry about it," replied Rita. "It's ballast. It'll hold us steady and keep the keel pointing down. Water in a boat isn't always a bad thing."  
"Well, that seems a touch counter-intuitive, but I have all the faith in the world that you're not as stupid as you look."  
Roddy grinned to himself and set about securing everything in the engine room. It would be a shame to have to tidy it all up again if Rita was right about what lay ahead. He sealed down the last of the lids and wandered back on deck.  
"Didn't I tell you to hang on?" shouted Rita, above the rising sound of water.  
"Yes, but there's more to hang on to up here!" Roddy moved to join her and then took stock of the tunnel. The arch of brickwork terminated just ahead of them.  
"I say, is that-"  
He didn't have time to finish. The boat went off the edge, displaying all the aeronautical ability of a sandbag. Rita's controlled flooding succeeded, and the keel remained steadfastly vertical as the boat plunged into the pool below, engines screaming as the propeller left the resistance of the water. Roddy had time to realise that his feet had floated free of the deck before they slammed down again and he landed spreadeagled across the hatch coaming.  
"How you doing back there?" called Rita, dusting herself down.  
"There are hypothetical circumstances in which I could be worse," muttered Roddy, pushing himself to his feet. "Where are we?"  
Rita looked around, her eyes widening in surprise. Daylight shone down from multiple vents set into the sides of a vast cylindrical brick chamber- one of Bazalgette's overflow weirs. But what had attracted her attention were the buildings that crowded the water's edge, so close that the roof of one was the front veranda of the one behind it. Rats moved to and fro between them, the ripple of conversation echoing in the chamber even above the sounds of the waterfall.

Roddy looked around in amazement. When he thought he had seen everything in the sewers, something like this would just pop up and smack him right in the face. Just as he thought this, he took a step forward and a loose floorboard flew up and whapped him on the snout.  
"Good grief!" he shouted out as he rubbed the sore appendage, "I have to be careful on what I think of from now on."  
He didn't hear Rita snickering, as he thought she would. Her eyes were looking around in amazement and slight worry, and as he wondered about the reason, she spoke up, "I don't see how we could get out of here...The only way that I can see is up that pipe." she pointed behind her to the tube that they had just came out of, "But I guess we can worry about that later. We can at least see what kind of place this is."

* * *

Mr Malone looked at it critically.

"It isn't that I don't understand the principle, Jasper, it's that I don't understand the way it works."

"It's not that complicated," said Jasper, pointing to the diagram on the desk with a piece of stick. "Look, transmission is just a matter of lines of sight. We put one on the clock tower and it'll basically cover the whole city. Simple as that. J, B&B Consultants are on the job. We're sharp and kicking bottom. Your worship." He grinned.

The newly-elected mayor of Ratropolis looked at his friend and rolled his eyes. He was still getting used to the title. The chains of office were draped over the back of the chair as they stood in the mayoral office discussing the plans for Mayor Malone's first major project- equipping the city for the 21st century with its own phone network. Salvage teams had been scouring the pipes for weeks to find enough lost mobiles.

"One transmitter for the whole city?" he said sceptically.

"Technically it's a relay, not a transmitter." Jasper waggled a hand. "It's an important difference but not one you need to worry about."

"Why not?"

"Because you have me here, remember? I didn't come all the way from Monaco to confuse you with the intricacies of modern telecommunications."

Mr Malone laughed. "I'm still not happy about one whatever-it-is. What happens if it breaks down?"

"We switch over to the Emergency Back-Up Device," said Jasper simply. "Or Devices, I should say."

"What are they?"

"Bruce and me on opposite sides of the city," volunteered Bruce One, who was attempting to balance his chair on the back two legs. "With megaphones."

Bruce Two gave a thumbs-up sign. Mr Malone sighed and gave Jasper an appealing look.

"What was that you were saying about the intricacies of modern telecommunications?"

"They're _big_ megaphones," said Bruce One, defensively. He demonstrated with his hands, overbalanced and fell over. Mr Malone watched him for a while until Bruce Two helped him up again.

"You ask for me, you see what you get." Jasper shrugged.

"I really do," said Mr Malone, pointedly. "So far the only thing that's gone right has been building those red boxes to put the phones into."

He pointed at the thing standing in the corner. A mobile phone had been built into a red and white box, the keypad forming one of the walls.

"Why red?" Bruce scratched his head.

"We tried building a blue phone box, but it started making funny noises and then disappeared," said Mr Malone. "Red is safer."

"I thought red ones went faster," said Jasper, grinning.

"Not these ones. Nobody is going to pinch these, I can promise you that. Security, that's the ticket. And getting them to work."

"Look, I've explained this to you already," said Jasper. "But I can do it again."

"You don't mind?"

"Of course not, I'm being paid by the hour aren't I? Most of the phones you've salvaged can use the thing the humans call…greentooth?"

"Bluetooth, mate," said Bruce One.

"Which is what I said," said Jasper briskly. "Anyway, that doesn't need line of sight but it also means that it's an open network. Everyone will be able to hear what everyone else is saying and you won't be able to have private conversations."

"Sounds like home," said Mr Malone, attempting to keep up.

"Right, which is why I don't think we should use that. Line of sight transmission only, which is why we need to put a relay on the clock tower. Are you all right, Mr Mayor?"

"I'm fine." Mr Malone sighed. "Just a simple scrap merchant trying to make my way, that's all."

"You could always take a break," said Jasper. "You let Roddy and Rita go, didn't you? I can take care of this."

"Yes, but they needed it. It was a hard campaign. It'll do them a world of good to get away from it all."

"Right," said Jasper noncommittally. He and the Bruces had witnessed enough of Roddy and Rita's last holiday to be under a slightly different set of illusions.

"They'll be fine, mate," said Number One Bruce. "When are they not?"

Bruce Two whispered something into his ear.

"_Apart_ from those times."

* * *

Rita piloted the _Jammy Dodger II_ along the waterfront. Roddy stared around them in amazement.

"I never even knew this place existed," he said.

"Neither did I," said Rita. "I don't think anyone back home does." She looked at her companion and smiled kindly. "Are you sure that plank didn't hit you too hard? You should probably put something on that face."

"What's wrong with my face?" said Roddy defensively, and almost immediately wished he hadn't. Rita grinned as she accepted the straight line that was handed to her.

"What's wrong with your face? It's inside out and upside down, that's what's wrong with it."

Roddy waved off the playful insult. "I haven't heard any complaints from you about it," he said.

"Weren't you just listening?" said Rita.

"Now why would I have been listening to you?" grinned Roddy.

"Who _nose_?" Rita grinned back and tweaked Roddy's sore nose, causing him to wince.

"All right, I'll soak a rag in some water," he said. "So how do we get back?"

"Get back?" Rita looked at him in surprise. "We only just got here! You think we should just run for home before finding out about this place?"

"Yes," said Roddy. "There's a thing called-"

"It can't be that bad, Roddy, not if people live here. It must be safe."

Roddy sighed. "I was about to say that there's a thing called tempting fate, which you do often enough to make me jealous and don't seem to learn from. But never mind. I think you just crossed that particular Rubicon."

"You're a little obsessed with the idea that I keep jinxing us, aren't you?" Rita smiled. "It's becoming almost old hat."

"Old hat?" Roddy smiled back and wagged a finger semi-seriously. "Rita, in the scientific community, when they notice that something is happening again and again and again, repeatedly, they don't call it 'old hat'. That's referred to as a _pattern_."

He looked around. The town covered one side of the immense chamber. The pipe they had arrived by occupied the opposite side. One of the other sides was a black wall, sheer and patchy with dark slime. The other wall was…well, missing. A concrete wall rose out of the water for a few feet and stopped abruptly, forming a low fence against the great subterranean void which loomed beyond it.

"What is this place?" he asked.

"It must be a weir," said Rita. "The local sewers overflow into it. It's sort of a holding pen for excess water. When it gets high enough it'll overflow that concrete barrier, which must go back into the main sewers."

"So that's our way home?"

"Again with the going home! Where's your sense of adventure, Roddy?"

"I left it in the engine room and forgot which cupboard I put it in," said Roddy.

"You leave anything else down there?" Rita raised a cheery eyebrow at him.

"No, no. But I stumbled across a small, withered prune-like object that I guessed was your sense of humour. Since you're getting along so well without it, I dumped it overboard." He smiled innocently.

"Don't make me order you to go and get it, then," said Rita, glaring with mock anger. "I wouldn't want to have to fish you out again."

Roddy scratched his head. "I don't remember the last time you gave me an order. I mean, a proper, formal, Captainy order. Not just an if-you-know-what's-good-for-you directive."

"Are you impugning my command, Roddy?" said Rita.

"I never knew your command had ever been 'pugned, ma'am," said Roddy, keeping his face carefully blank.

"I'll give you 'pugned in a minute," she muttered.

"Really? I'll look forward to it." Roddy looked around. "Not that I don't enjoy the cut and thrust of what passes for conversation with you, but I really think we have bigger concerns."

"Like what?"

Roddy stared. "Are you in your own little world over there? We don't know where we are or how we're going to get home!"

"In challenge lies opportunity, Roddy," said Rita, wagging a finger.

"No, in challenge lies challenge," said Roddy, staring at her. "And then challenge. In fact you'll find it's just challenge all the way down. 'In challenge lies opportunity'? Next time you'll say that things which don't kill you make you stronger."

"You mean they don't?" Rita grinned.

"Now you're just being contrarian," said Roddy, sighing.

"No, I'm not." Rita winked and turned the wheel, bringing them towards a jetty. "Prepare to tie up. We'll go ashore and see what we can see."

Roddy picked up a coil of rope and tied a loop in one end. He watched the jetty approach and draw level as Rita put the engines into reverse and let them drift closer on the thrusters. Roddy swung the loop once or twice and tossed it out, letting it fall neatly around the mooring post. He grinned with satisfaction and blew on his fingers. Rita secured the bow rejoined Roddy as he carefully balanced a plank to bridge the gap.

"After you," he said.

Rita nodded and looked around the deck, pausing to pick up the grapnel and line.

"You never know," she said. "With particular-"

"With particular emphasis on 'you'," said Roddy wearily. "Meaning of course, me. Now that's something which deserves the label, 'old hat'."

"Old hat?" Rita suppressed a laugh and wagged her finger at Roddy. "Roddy, in the scientific community, when they notice that something is happening again and again and again, repeatedly, they don't call it 'old hat'. That's referred to as a _pattern_."

"Touché," said Roddy. "So you think we'll need it?"

Rita sighed. "I don't know, Roddy. I really don't."

Roddy nodded glumly. She straightened up and adjusted the rope around her shoulders.

"All ashore who's going ashore," she said. Roddy followed her across the plank and paused to look back at the _Jammy Dodger II_. Resplendent in red and white, it was the only familiar, comforting presence in the great, strange weir.

"Come along! Keep up!"

Roddy smiled to himself. Maybe the boat wasn't the only one after all.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three: Modern Communications**

Rita was surprised at how little attention their arrival had generated. When a boat pulled into Ratropolis, it became the centre of a localised whirlwind of longshoremen, stevedores, hawkers and people with nothing better to do. The docks of the town in the weir were almost deserted. Buildings stood virtually derelict and the few people who lived there reminded Rita all too much of poverty- the real stuff, the relentless, chronic kind which ate into the soul and which her family had barely escaped.

"Where did everyone go?" said Roddy, raising his head to listen to the ripples of conversation drifting across the weir. "I know we saw people on the way in."

"They're all up there," said Rita, pointing to the higher levels of the city. "But it looks like the docks are abandoned. Look, even the boats which are here haven't been looked after."

She pointed to a vessel about the _Dodger_'s size. The paint had peeled off it, and it was being kept afloat only by the rotting mooring lines that prevented it from slipping below the surface entirely.

"How could people let things get like this?" Roddy shook his head in disbelief. Rita looked at him sideways and reminded herself that Roddy, changed as he had become, was still from very different roots to hers.

"It's what happens when just surviving takes all your efforts," she said. "It doesn't leave much time for anything else."

Roddy nodded sadly, coming to a realisation similar to the one Rita had just had. He decided to leave the topic.

"And I suppose there aren't many places to take a boat. You can't leave the weir." He looked up at the town above them. "It's so different to back home."

Rita stepped around a pile of debris and looked up sharply as a small figure darted out of the half-sunken derelict and leapt onto the shore. It stopped to stare at them for a moment and Rita looked into a pair of bright eyes set in a young face, alight with curiosity. It was a small figure, no more than a child, and it made no moves to escape as she waved.

"Hey! We won't hurt you!"

The young rat moved along the rotting jetty and looked at her. It was probably male, but it was hard to tell. His face was dirty and his clothes appeared to have been improvised from anything that came to hand.

Rita knelt to appear less threatening, motioning for Roddy to do the same.

"My name's Rita. This is Roddy. Who are you?"

"Why do you want to know?" The boy looked her up and down.

"Because we're new here," said Rita. "We need to speak to someone. Can you help us?"

"Depends on who you want to talk to," said the boy. "You should probably talk to Algy first."

"Who's Algy?" asked Roddy.

The boy looked at him with the pitying expression reserved for those who are chronically stupid.

"Who I'm taking you to see, of course. I'm Denny, by the way." He flashed a smile and led them up the street. Rita stood and followed without hesitation. Roddy ran to catch up.

"Do you know where he's taking us?" he asked.

"Of course not." Rita shrugged. "But what choice do we have? He's the only person we know here. Besides, look at him. I could lift him up with one finger. I think we can take him if it comes to that."

Roddy nodded. "All right, so long as you trust him."

"What makes you think I trust him?"

"Isn't that what you just told me?"

"What makes you think I trust you?" Rita smiled and squeezed Roddy's hand affectionately. "Stop worrying. Whoever this Algy person is must be able to tell us something."

"Well, this will be the second time I fetched up somewhere unexpected and followed a blind lead," said Roddy.

"When was the first time?" asked Rita.

"When I first got flushed into Ratropolis," said Roddy. "That old guy with the peg leg told me I should look for you."

"And you followed him?"

"I didn't think I had much choice. Besides, he had a talking fish. What's the world coming to, Rita, if we can't trust talking fish? He led me straight to you."

"So that didn't really pay off," Rita smiled.

"I've regretted it ever since," Roddy grinned back.

Denny disappeared out of sight up a side alley. It was so narrow that Roddy and Rita had to move up it sideways. It climbed steeply between buildings on either side, leading away from the crumbling docks.

"So where'd you two blow in from?" said Denny. "I don't remember seeing you around the docks. And I know everything that happens there."

"You do?"

"'Course I do." Denny grinned. "Come on, keep up."

He led them into a street, narrow by any standards but a welcome expanse after the dingy alley. There were people here, going about their business, but the sense of poverty remained. A stall had been set up and the tired old ratwoman behind it was selling what seemed to Roddy to be mere scraps of dirty cotton. Were things that bad?

"We're…not from around here," said Roddy.

"I can see that, that's why I asked." Denny dodged around the stall and knocked on a set of doors. "Anyway, this is Algy's place."

He knocked on them doors. Rita looked up appraisingly. They were double doors set into one of the largest buildings they had yet seen. It was an old oil drum turned on its side and half-buried in silt. A ragged hole had been cut into one end and the doors jury-rigged over it. At one stage they had been painted green, but the colour had faded into a sickly shade. From inside came a footsteps and the doors opened.

"Yes? What is it? Oh, it's you, Denny. Shouldn't you be in school now?"

Denny shifted in embarrassment. "Please, Algy! There's two people here who need to see you!"

"Who are they?" The figure behind the door stepped out. It was a rat, and probably slightly younger than Roddy and Rita but with a face that had clearly seen too much trouble already. He was wearing black with a think strip of battered purple ribbon about his shoulders. A small patch of white stood out on his collar. He regarded Roddy and Rita with surprise.

"Oh! I see. Thank you, Denny. Run along now, your teachers will be missing you."

Denny shifted again. "You couldn't make it worth my while, could you, Algy? You know how things are."

"I know how things are for everyone, Denny. I'm sorry." He smiled sadly and turned to Roddy extending a hand. "How do you do?"

"Um, well," said Roddy, who was still trying to catch up. "I'm Roddy. This is Rita. And you're Algy?"

"I'm Father Algernon," said the young rat. "Come in, both of you. Not you, Denny, what did I just say?"

Inside, Roddy looked around. It was probably a chapel, but not much of one. The altar was a rectangular shape beneath a white cloth and the roof of the barrel curved above them. Candles hung from it at irregular intervals, but their light served more to deepen the shadows than to chase them away. Roddy took a few steps and banged his knee on the end of a pew, causing him to utter a sentiment or two not normally heard on consecrated ground. Rita shot him a dirty look and he grinned sheepishly. Algernon didn't seem to have noticed.

"You're the priest here?" said Rita.

"I suppose so, but I'm not ordained." Algernon sat down.

"But you said you were Father Algernon?" said Roddy, rubbing his shin.

"So I am. That's my name, not a job description." Algernon shrugged and smiled. "There was a mistake in the format of my birth certificate. I suppose it could have been worse. I might have ended up being Mother Algernon or Hospital Algernon or Nationality Algernon. Anyway, that's not what you're here for. What can I do for you?"

"Well, you could tell us exactly where 'here' is," said Rita. "We're not from these parts. We fetched up here kind of by accident."

"Lost travellers?" said Algernon.

"Not 'lost'," said Rita, bristling at the word. "Just…mislaid."

Algernon laughed. "Aren't we all? You're in the Upper Hyde Overflow Weir. Where did you come from?"

"Ratropolis," said Roddy.

"Ah! The old city? How exciting." Algernon leaned forwards. "It's been a long time since we heard from there."

"We never even knew this place existed," said Rita. "How many people live here?"

"Oh, one or two hundred. Most of whom got here in the same way you did."

Rita looked at Roddy and remembered something he had said before- maybe people had got past the Hyde Park Rapids, but hadn't been able to get back…

"Can you get out of here?" she asked, knowing the answer.

Algernon shook his head. "I'm afraid not. The weir never fills up enough to let us sail back into the sewers. A few people have tried of course. We never…see them again."

The young priest cast his eyes into a corner of the room. Roddy looked and saw that the wall was covered with pieces of paper, each bearing a name and a date. He swallowed. No wonder Algernon looked so tired.

* * *

"Left a bit!"

Number One Bruce waved a flag. He was standing atop the Ratropolis clock tower. Above him, suspended from its garishly coloured balloon, was Jasper's patented flying machine, the _Flying Malone_. Jasper was sitting at the controls, wary of the harness hanging from the undercarriage, which held the repeater for the city's new phone network. Number Two Bruce was hanging among the ropes, relaying Number One Bruce's instructions.

"That's about it!"

Jasper peered down. "It's got to be better than 'about it'! This is science!"

"That's never stopped us before!" shouted back Bruce. "Put her down there, mate, we'll secure her on!"

Muttering darkly, Jasper descended, lowering the repeater onto the tower roof. Bruce Two leap from it, drawing a spanner from his belt.

"Good work, mate," he said. "Not bad at all."

"She'll be apples," said Bruce One. He picked up his own spanner and began attaching the repeater. Quite a crowd had gathered below them, attracted as much by the spectacle as by the possibility of a fearsome calamity. Bruce Two waved to them and struck a pose on one leg, juggling his spanner and a trio of bolts. There was some applause.

"What the blazes do you think you're doing?" shouted Jasper. "Fix the thing!"

Bruce Two stopped and looked up at the irate mechanic.

"Just having a bit of fun, mate!"

"You can do that once that thing's attached," said Jasper. "Safety first, remember?"

"All too well," said Bruce One. He squinted down at the crowd. Mr Malone was standing at the front of it, watching their progress.

"We could do with some help here," said Bruce Two. "This isn't the easiest gig in the world."

"You heard the mayor, mate," said Bruce One. "All the city's work crews are out looking for more phones."

"I'd have asked Roddy and Rita to help if they were back," said Jasper. "But they've got better things to be doing together."

The two Bruces exchanged identically-meaningful grins.

"I heard that!" said Jasper.

"We didn't say anything!" protested Bruce One.

"Oh, like you needed to. You know what I meant!"

"Hardly ever," said Bruce One. He tightened the last bolt and wiped his forehead. "Let's hope this thing works."

* * *

"So there's no way out of here?" asked Roddy.

"None that we've been able to make work," said Algernon. "It's all about water levels. There's no way to get this weir to overflow, and that's the only way back into the sewers. There's just not enough water."

Rita was pacing up and down. "There's got to be a way," she said.

"Have you tried contacting Ratropolis?"

"How could we?" Algernon shook his head. "There's no way to get a message back through the sewers. Besides, what could they do to help us?"

"More than you think," said Rita. "My father's the new mayor there. He'd be able to do something."

"He's a little busy now, though," said Roddy. "Setting up the phones and everything."

"Phones?" said Algernon, looking up with interest.

"It's his latest thing," said Roddy. "He wants to…what was it he said, Rita? Introduce the city to the wonders of the telecommunications revolution?"

"No, that was Jasper. Dad said he wanted to be able to call mum from the office to say when he'd be late for dinner," said Rita.

"Has he got it working yet?" asked Algernon.

"Probably has at least part of it set up by now," said Rita, shrugging. "Not that it's much good to us."

"Why do you say that?" Algernon was grinning. He stood up and moved behind the altar.

"Well, we haven't got a phone here, have we? How can we call them?"

Roddy realised what Algernon was grinning about. "Oh, I think one might be closer than you think, Rita…"

"What?" she peered around.

Algernon took the altar cloth in both hands and swept it back with a flourish to reveal the shape beneath it. An old-fashioned rectangular mobile phone had been propped up to keep it off the floor.

"Voila," he said. "I was wondering when this thing would come in handy."

"Does it work?" Rita leapt to her feet and examined it. Roddy helped Algernon turn it face-up. He pressed one or two of the buttons and shook his head.

"Doesn't look like it to me. Battery's dead."

Algernon's face fell. "Oh…sorry about that. I thought…maybe we could fix it."

"Are you sure it's just the battery?" Rita was looking at some of the sockets on the phone with a speculative expression.

"No," said Roddy.

"Why do you ask?" said Algernon.

"It's a crazy idea…" said Rita, scratching her head.

"Never stopped you before," said Roddy.

Rita accepted the joke with a small bow. "I was thinking…we've got the auxiliary battery pack on the _Dodger_. Since I stopped you draining it, we might be able to get it to run this."

Roddy smiled. "You're really not a pretty face, are you?"

"Don't you mean, not _just_ a pretty face?" suggested Algernon.

Roddy paused in thought for a moment. "No…no, I don't think I did."

Rita rolled her eyes. "Won't anyone ask why we're carrying your altar down to the docks, Algy?"

The priest shrugged. "Don't see why. It's my altar."

Rita picked up one end of the phone and motioned for Roddy to take the other. "Well, let's at least try."

* * *

Mr Malone stepped onto the stage and waved to the crowd that had gathered to watch the repeater being installed. High above them on the clock tower, the two Bruces were sitting on the gutter while Jasper circled in the _Flying Malone_.

"This is a great day for the city!" he said, to cheers. "This is the day when we caught up with the world. From today, we will be able to say that we are at the cutting edge." He gestured behind him, where one of the new phone boxes had been set up.

"I'm a mayor who keeps his promises," he said. "And there's none that I'm prouder of having kept than this one. From today-"

The phone in the box lit up and began ringing an unfashionable tune. Mr Malone was thrown off-balance for a moment and the crowd tittered at the unscripted interruption. Mr Malone looked up at Jasper, who shrugged.

"Well, somebody answer it!" shouted a voice from the crowd.

Mr Malone nodded. "Sid?"

"Eh?" the sewer rat looked up from the side of the stage.

"Answer the phone."

Sid licked his lips. "Er…you sure you don't want to do that, chief? Inaugural speech and everything?"

"I'm sure."

Sid grinned weakly and went into the box. He kicked the 'ANSWER' button and listened for a moment. He stuck his head out and called over the Mr Malone.

"It's for you, boss!"

There was scattered laughter in the crowd. Mr Malone frowned.

"For me?"

"I think it's Rita, boss."

Mr Malone jumped down from the stage and shouldered his way through the audience, which had grown somewhat since things began going obviously awry.

"Yes?" he said.

"_Dad?"_ It was definitely Rita, but the reception was appalling.

"Not right now, girl," said Mr Malone, trying to smile. "I'm kind of working at the moment."

"_You won't believe what's happened, Mr Malone!"_ That was probably Roddy.

"_Keep it to a dull roar, could you, Roddy?"_ said Rita. _"This is hard enough as it is."_

"_So it does work!" _said a third voice. _"Gosh, how exciting."_

"Who's that?" asked Mr Malone, confused.

"_Never mind," _said Rita. _"Just listen."_

"Now really isn't a good time, Rita," Mr Malone insisted.

"_What's wrong with it? Don't you like the colour?"_

"_Are you sure now is the right time to be making jokes, Rita?"_ asked Roddy's voice.

"_That wasn't a joke, Roddy."_

"_You don't need to tell me."_

"Are you two done yet?" Mr Malone sighed. "Look, give me the number you're calling from and I'll get back to you."

There was a telling pause from the other end of the line.

"You…don't know what the number is, do you?"

* * *

Rita stared at the phone, which was propped up against the _Jammy Dodger II_'s engine, its lights bright beneath a patina of grime.

"How do you get this thing to tell you what number it is?" she muttered, peering around the sides and looking for it. Roddy watched her with some interest.

"I don't think you get the number out of it that way," he said.

"The number's inside it?" Rita straightened up.

"Sort of," said Roddy, who was clearly enjoying this. "You don't actually know how these things work, do you?"

Rita didn't answer. "I'll call you back, dad," she said, and severed the connection. She turned to Roddy, who was still grinning.

"And you can stop that right now," she said.

Roddy saluted and began pressing buttons on the phone. "Don't worry, I'll find the number. Have you got some paper to write it down? You can write, can't you?"

Algernon dug a notebook out of a pocket. "Are you sure he'll be able to help us?"

"Sure I'm sure," said Rita. "Probably."

"Here's the number," said Roddy. He stepped aside to allow Rita to copy the digits off the screen. "Pity we couldn't finish talking to your father then. I wonder what his problem was?"

"We probably interrupted something," said Rita. "Is that a six or a nine?"

Roddy squinted. The phone's display was much the worse for having been used as an altar.

"Actually I think it's an eight," he said. "That's one of the ones in between, in case you were wondering."

"Is it really? My, aren't you a regular Bertrand Russell!" Rita grinned.

"No, I'm an exceptional Bertrand Russell," said Roddy. "When the other Bertrand Russells need help, they come to me, so you'll need to take a number and wait in line."

"Oh, you know me and numbers, Roddy, I think I'd just skip the waiting part."

* * *

Mr Malone walked into the office, closely followed by Jasper.

"That didn't exactly go to plan," he said.

"Why not?" asked Jasper. "The point was to make the inaugural call on our new phone system. A call was made."

"Yes, but the wrong way around!" Mr Malone sat down at his desk. "I wonder what Rita was worried about. Not like her to need to call home."

Sid crept into the room, holding a dirty scrap of paper.

"I got the number, chief."

Mr Malone took it off him and passed it to Jasper, who dialled the mayoral phone. It rang once or twice before a voice answered it.

"_Han Chin Chinese Takeout, hello?"_

"Hello?" Mr Malone leaned towards the phone.

"_Yes?"_

"Um…Rita's there, is she?"

"_Rice here? You want fried or white?"_

"What?"

"_Fried or white?"_

"Fried rice is good," whispered Sid. Mr Malone glared at him.

"No, I think..."

"_You want Wonton or not?"_

"Cancel that." Mr Malone hit the button and severed the line. He stared at the phone for a few moments and then looked at Jasper.

"I'm not really sure what was going on there," he said.

Jasper squinted at the piece of paper.

"I might have got the number wrong. Is that a six or a nine?"

Sid leaned over his shoulder. "I think it's an eight," he said.

"That would explain it, then." Jasper dialled and waited for the ringing tone to come through.

"_Dad?"_

It was definitely Rita. Mr Malone smiled with relief.

"Oh, good, I was worried there for a moment. How have you been, Rita?"

"_Yeah, good, Dad, but that's not important right now. We're going to need your help."_

"Is Roddy there?"

"_I'm here, Mr Malone,"_ said Roddy.

"You're all right?"

"_Dad, could you stop asking if everyone's all right? We're both fine."_

"So what's the problem?" Mr Malone dragged his desk chair over to the phone and sat on it.

"_Is Jasper there?"_

"I'm here," said Jasper. "Why?"

"_This might be sort of…more your area than Dad's."_

"You mean it's complicated and involves thinking?" Jasper winked at Mr Malone.

"_Yeah, sort of…firstly, we've got to explain to you where we are…"_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four: Jasper's Big Idea**

Jasper was listening intently as Rita talked, sketching on a piece of paper as he did so. Mr Malone was pacing up and down nervously.

"Any ideas, Jasper?" he asked.

"Give me half a minute," said Jasper. "I'm trying to figure out the kind of volume we're talking about."

"Er, I think it's that button there," said Sid helpfully, pointing to a control on the phone.

"Not volume as in noise, volume as in capacity." Jasper gave him a withering look.

"_Is everything all right there?" _asked Rita over the phone.

"No," said Jasper, muttering.

"It's fine, girl," said Mr Malone, cutting in. "We're on the case now. We'll soon have something for you."

There was a pause.

"_Dad, when you say 'we', does that include Sid?"_

"No," said Jasper, more firmly.

"_All right. Call us back when you've got it?"_

"I will," promised Mr Malone. "Good luck. Take care of each other."

"_Yeah, dad. Of course. See you!"_

The line went dead. Mr Malone looked at Jasper questioningly.

"The good news," said the mechanic. "Is that I might have a plan. Do you have a map of the sewers anywhere around here?"

Mr Malone nodded. "The Planning Department should. Sid? Go and get it for me."

"Righto, chief." Sid darted out.

"And I'll need a map of the city Up Top as well," said Jasper. "With particular reference to the Thames."

"Why? What are you thinking?"

"Many things, Mr Mayor, many things. If they're in a weir, we need to figure out a way to raise the water level to get them out. It'll take a lot of water to do it, and you don't get much better water sources than the Thames!"

Sid returned, struggling under a long, rolled chart.

"This whole thing, boss, with Rita and Roddy ending up in a weir…" he began.

"Yes?" said Mr Malone.

"It's…well…weir'd. Don't you think?" Sid grinned hopefully.

Mr Malone exchanged looks with Jasper.

"It's like that joke was inevitable, isn't it?" he said. "And you just have to stand there and watch it coming."

Sid sighed and spread the chart out onto the floor. It showed a maze of multicoloured lines, delineating the subterranean structure of the city. Jasper knelt over it and examined it critically.

"And the map of Up Top?" he asked.

Mr Malone turned to Sid. "Didn't you get one of them just the other day?"

Sid grinned nervously. "Well, sort of, chief, but the thing is I kind of used it."

"As what?"

"Wallpaper, chief. My office needed some doing up."

Mr Malone picked up a letter-opener from his desk- a piece of staple set into a wooden handle. Sid moaned.

"Please, boss! I just put it up yesterday!"

"And you can have the same fun tomorrow," said Mr Malone. "Come on."

The mayor frogmarched his chief-of-staff out of the room. To the sound of tearing paper, Jasper frowned and looked at his sketches.

"Redirecting a river, eh?" He chuckled. "Well, this'll be something to write home about."

* * *

Rita propped the phone up in the corner of the engine room.

"You're all right with leaving it here, Algy?"

Algernon nodded. "Oh, sure. I won't need it for a few days anyway. Do you really think your father can get us out of here?"

"My father can do it," said Rita, confidently. "They'll think of something."

Roddy opened his mouth to say something and stopped. He raised a finger to his lips in a gesture for silence. Rita frowned.

"What's happening?" asked Algernon. Rita waved him into silence. Above them, they could hear light footsteps on deck. A floorboard creaked.

"C sharp," said Rita. "Port side near the cockpit!"

She darted up the steps, Roddy close behind. Algernon followed, still wondering what was going on. Rita rolled out onto the deck and glared towards the bow. A small, shadowy figure paused in the act of examining the controls and looked around sharply.

"Hey! Who invited you on board? Get lost!"

The figure waved a hand frantically.

"Please, miss! I wasn't stealing anything! I was just looking! Algy, tell them!"

Roddy looked to Algernon, who sighed resignedly.

"Denny, is that you?" he said.

Denny stepped out of the shadows.

"It's me, Algy. I promise I wasn't doing anything. Or going to do anything," he added, with a glance at Rita.

"Didn't I tell you to go back to school, Denny?" said Algernon. "The docks are no place for you anyway, never mind boarding other people's boats."

"Yes, Algy. Sorry, Algy." Denny shifted his feet.

"You don't need to apologise to me," said Algernon. "It isn't my boat. You should be apologising to Rita and Roddy here."

Denny looked up at Rita, who shook her head.

"Don't worry about it. No harm done."

"Rita?" Roddy was surprised. Trespassing wasn't something Rita usually tolerated unless she was doing it.

"I said, don't worry about it." Rita repeated. "Do as Father Algernon says, Denny."

The young rat smiled with relief and dropped lightly over the side of the _Jammy Dodger II_ before scurrying back into the town. Rita watched him go.

"Don't mind him," said Algernon. "He's always been a handful."

"Are you his father?" asked Roddy, not thinking the question through properly.

"Do you see this thing around my neck?" Algernon grinned and pointed to his collar. "No, but I was a friend of his parents. I'd better follow him back, make sure he really does go to school this time."

The priest clambered over the rail and set off after Denny.

"I must say ,that was unexpectedly nice of you," said Roddy. "I remember what happened when you caught me sneaking around your boat."

"What are you getting at?"

"Nothing, nothing. Just saying…if I didn't know you better, I'd say you were mellowing."

"Mellowing nothing. Like I said, no harm done. Besides…" Rita's green eyes softened and she smiled to herself. "That kid reminds me of someone I used to know."

Roddy thought for a moment. "Sid?"

"Sid was never that thin. No, no, I meant he reminds me of me. When I was his age. Dad and Jasper were busy building the _Dodger_, Mum had the house to look after and she'd just had Liam as well. I got left to my own devices a lot. I learned my way around the sewers that way, got into a few close scrapes. Anyhow," she shook herself to break the spell of memory. "Nothing to do now but wait for dad to call us back."

* * *

The Mayor banged on the table with his gavel, which broke.

"I thought I asked you to fix that," he said to Sid. The chief-of-staff shrugged and grinned innocently.

"I thought I did, boss. Who'd have thought that a bit of chewy wouldn't do the job?"

Mr Malone rolled his eyes and turned back to the meeting. He had summoned everyone in the city who might be of help with Jasper's plan, which wasn't many. Colin, the recently-promoted Chief Commissioner of Police, was looking uncomfortable in his new starched uniform. There was also Pegleg Jim, probably the most experienced mariner in London although it had been with great difficulty that he had been persuaded to leave his hotplate outside. The talking fish which had become synonymous with his name was sitting in a glass bowl of water and rotating happily.

"Here's the pitch," said Jasper, pointing to the maps pinned up on the wall behind him. "The mayor's daughter and Roddy are trapped in the Upper Hyde Overflow Weir. That's here. They need to get back to Ratropolis, which is here. The way to do that is to follow this trunk tunnel." He traced the route between the two points.

"Problem is, to get them out of the weir, we need to get it to overflow into the trunk tunnel. That'll require a great deal of water. Fortunately, we have such an opportunity close to hand."

"He enjoys this, doesn't he?" whispered Sid to one of the Bruces, who had turned up eating some cold chips salvaged from Pegleg's hotplate.

"The Thames is a tidal river as you all know. That's why the humans built the Thames Barrier- if it wasn't there, London would spend a part of the year underwater. The king tides are the most serious, and we are fortunate to have one just around the corner." Jasper pointed towards the door. The other Bruce wandered around it at that stage, licking his fingers. He noticed the room staring at him and grinned sheepishly.

"Let me get this straight," said Colin. "You want to flood the city of London?"

"No," said Jasper. "But if even a fraction of the king tide comes up the Thames, it'll raise the water level in the sewers. The entire Upper Hyde region will empty into that weir, which will allow our daring duo to make good their egression."

"And what happens here?" said Mr Malone. "You're talking about flooding the whole sewer system."

Jasper scratched his chin. "How are you off for sandbags?" he asked.

Mr Malone sighed. "All right, I get it. What does the Barrier have to do with this?"

"We've got to stop it from closing," said Jasper. "If one of its gates is left open, that'll allow enough water upriver to do what we need it to do. In other words, we've got to get out to the Barrier and…adjust it."

"Knacker it," volunteered Number One Bruce.

"Just so."

"It be a right ambitious plan you got here, matey," said Pegleg, sitting up and leaning forward. "And one I daresay be fraught with dangers."

Mr Malone listened patiently. Pegleg was usually worth listening to, but his dialogue style took some getting used to.

"Legend has it," Pegleg went on, lowering his voice for dramatic effect, "That the Barrier is home to all manner of beasts. A perilous place it be. A great evil lies over it, they do say. They do say that one sight of it be enough…to send ye mad…" He lifted his patch and leered, the eyeball underneath it revolving crazily.

"You've seen it, have you?" said Mr Malone, without really thinking about it.

"No," said Pegleg, sitting back. "Just saying as what others say."

Mr Malone looked over to Jasper, who shrugged.

"This is the only way, Mr Mayor."

Mr Malone sighed. "How do we get to the Barrier? It's miles away, isn't it?"

"Yes, your worship," said Jasper simply. "But you are fortunate in having at your service a flying machine of most awesome capacity and a crew of supreme indefatigability."

"There's us and the _Flying Malone_ too," said Number One Bruce, grinning cheerily. Jasper glared.

"That thing?" said Colin, dubiously. "Are you sure, sir?"

"I'm sure there's nothing else that can get us there," said Jasper. "The king tide is in two days."

"What are the dangers, Jim?"

Pegleg grinned. "Oh, there be all sort of things to wreck your day Up Top, your eminence. But it's the birds I'd be a-looking for."

"Birds?" said Sid.

"Thames seabirds," said Pegleg. "They flies up the estuary when the tide comes in. I'd be careful before flying into their airspace, matey, very careful."

Mr Malone looked to Jasper. "Anything you can do about that?"

Jasper shrugged. "Well, as the French say, _rouler plus vite_."

"And what do the English say?"

"Drive faster. But there might be something we could do with the _Malone_. Make it defensible."

"You mean…arm it?" said one of the Bruces, hopefully.

"Yes." Jasper looked at Mr Malone and raised an eyebrow. "I don't imagine you've got any Bren guns lying around, Mr Mayor?"

"No," said Mr Malone heavily, who was wondering where all of this was going to end up. "What do we have? Col?"

"Huh? Oh…well…I'm not sure I'm allowed to do that, sir." Colin shifted nervously. "It's…it's evidence, see. Need-to-know basis."

"I'm the mayor. You're the police chief. What is it?" Mr Malone narrowed his eyes. Colin scratched his head.

"Well…we've still got that staple gun. You remember, the one the Toad used to have? We picked that up when we swept the crime scene after the World Cup. I think it still works."

"Staple gun?" said the Bruces in unison. Jasper looked over and was not surprised to see the identical grins on their faces. He sighed.

"Well, let's at least have a look at it."

* * *

Rita was kneeling on the deck with a hammer in one hand and a bunch of nails in the other.

"Right, try it again."

Roddy sighed and stepped onto the plank. It creaked. Rita frowned in concentration and shook her head.

"It still doesn't sound right to me, Roddy. It should be C sharp and that doesn't sound sharp."

Roddy shook his head. "Are you sure that now is the right time to re-tune the decking?"

"It has to be done sooner or later, Roddy. This is our security system, remember? If Denny could get on board, so could anyone else." Rita hammered a nail in. "Play it again, Sam."

Roddy stepped on the plank again. "That was a surprisingly cultured reference from you," he commented.

Rita grinned up at him. "I can quote _Gone with the Wind_ with the best of them."

Roddy rolled his eyes. "I spoke too soon, didn't I? If we're done here I'll make a start on a meal."

Rita pressed her ear to the floorboard. "Yeah, I guess we're done…I'm still not sure, though. Is there a tuning fork on board?"

"Yes, but it's in the cupboard with my guitar." Roddy brightened up and he grinned. "Speaking of which…"

"Ah-ah!" Rita stood up, a finger raised sternly. "Mind on the job, Roddy."

He saluted and went below deck. Rita hammered another nail into the deck and joined him. Roddy was placing a saucepan on the hotplate and then began hunting through cupboards.

"Rice all right tonight, Rita?"

"You say that like I have a choice," smiled Rita.

Roddy grinned. "I like to maintain a façade. So you really think your father and Jasper will be able to think of something to get us out of here?"

"You think they won't?"

Roddy shrugged. "Well…Jasper's not exactly _compos mentis_ within the meaning of the term…"

"Not exactly compost-what?" Rita frowned.

Roddy sighed. "Of sound mind. Little thing called Latin. What do you think Denny was doing on board, anyway?"

Rita picked up the jar of rice and shook it playfully at Roddy. "Oh, looking at things. I told you, I used to be a bit like him. I learned my way around the drains like that. Learned a lot of things, actually."

"And your father was happy to let you go?"

"My father never knew!" Rita laughed. "No, he was too busy building the _Jammy Dodger_ to have much time for me. I mostly stayed with mum, but with Liam to look after, she was pretty easy to get away from." She smiled. "I had all sorts of adventures back then…dad always thought my knowledge of the drains was instinctive. He never knew that I'd probably been there before!"

"He never figured it out?" Roddy tipped a handful of rice into the pot.

"Oh, he did. One day there was a storm surge- a big build-up of water in the sewers. I lost my footing and probably would have drowned. It was dad who saved me. I remember thinking that this was a bloody stupid way to die when a big hand reached into the water and pulled me out." She smiled again. "It was dad. He'd finished the _Dodger_ and was taking it out for the first time. Lucky for me!"

"Lucky for all sorts of people," said Roddy. "You must have been a right handful. I wonder how Denny's parents cope?"

The phone, which was still propped up in the corner, rang. Rita leaped over to it and hit the button.

"Dad?"

"_Hello, Rita. Roddy, are you there?"_

"I'm here, Mr Malone!" Roddy called.

"Have you got an idea?" asked Rita.

There was a moment's hesitation. _"Well…I guess you could call it that."_

"Oh, dear…" Roddy went over to join Rita. She waved him off.

"Don't leave the rice on the heat! You know what happens if you let the water boil off!"

"_Rita?"_

"Sorry, dad, talking to my first mate. What's the plan?"

There was another moment's hesitation.

"_I'd better put Jasper on_._"_

There was a brief scuffle.

"_Rita?"_ It was Jasper.

"Hello, uncle," said Rita. "How have you been?"

"_Better than you, I fancy. I've had a brilliant idea to get you out. It may even work."_

Rita and Roddy listened to Jasper's plan, the former with admiration and the latter with increasing disbelief.

"This is what I meant about _compos mentis_," said Roddy. "There's something very wrong here. I thought our job was to _stop_ towns being flushed away, now we've got to cause it!"

"_Town?"_ Mr Malone came back on the line. _"I thought it was just you two?"_

"You wouldn't believe it, dad," said Rita. "There's a town here of people like us, people who got stuck here and couldn't leave. I think most of them are from Ratropolis."

"_How many of them are there?"_

"What was it Algernon said? About a hundred?" Roddy scratched his head.

"_A hundred? You could have said this earlier. You'll never fit everyone on the boat!"_

"We can sort something out," said Rita. "We'll handle that side of it."

"_You've only got a day or so before we have to hit the Thames Barrier," _warned Jasper. _"Whatever it is, you'll need to think fast."_

"I've never thought any other way," said Rita. "Thanks, dad. Thanks, Jasper. We'll call you back if there's a problem."

She hung up and turned to Roddy. "And what's your problem?"

Roddy opened his mouth to reply when a floorboard creaked above them.

"E flat," said Rita. She grinned at Roddy. "And you asked why I bothered! Come on!"

She came out on deck to find Algernon leaning against the rail.

"Hello," he said. "I was wondering…have you heard anything from your father?"

"You have an extraordinary sense of timing," said Roddy, from the hatch.

Algernon brightened up. "So he has a plan to save us?"

"Yep," said Rita, grinning. "Told you he wouldn't let us down."

Roddy coughed. Rita shot him a glare.

"So when can we do it?" said Algernon.

"Not for a day or so. They're waiting for a high tide. They think that'll raise the water level enough to let us just sail out of here." Rita waved over the concrete barrier. "You think that'll work?"

"I wouldn't know," said Algernon. "But that's the kind of thing we'll have to ask everyone about…I'll set up a meeting in the church so you can explain the plan."

"Would you care to join us for dinner?" asked Roddy, holding up the saucepan. "There's some vegetable stock to go with it."

Algernon held up a hand. "Thank you, but no. I'll need to get the word around pretty quick."

"Can you get everyone there?" said Rita, a thoughtful expression on her face.

"What, in the church? Oh, yes. Besides, it isn't as if there's anything better to do. Everyone will be there, don't worry." Algernon smiled reassuringly and climbed back over the rail.

"I never knew you were such a democrat," said Roddy, stirring the rice and savouring the aroma.

"Pardon?"

"Well, that's why you asked if everyone would be at the church, wasn't it?"

Rita looked from Roddy to the _Jammy Dodger II_ and then up at the curving metal shape of the church.

"Yeah…that as well…"

* * *

The church was filled with noise, voices resonating metallically from the arching roof of the steel drum. Algernon had been as good as his word. It looked like the whole town had turned up, the early arrivals staking out spaces on the pews but the latecomers having to stand in the aisles and around the edges. Rita and Roddy were standing behind the new altar. Roddy looked around the room and spotted Denny in the front row, attempting to cadge a piece of carrot from someone. Algernon clapped his hands for silence.

"Thank you all for coming at such short notice! This is an important meeting, perhaps the most important we have ever held!"

"It'd better be! I stood up the Queen to be here!" someone shouted. There was a ripple of laughter.

Algernon raised his hands. "I'd have invited her as well if I'd known! As some of you may have seen, we have some new arrivals in town!" He gestured to Roddy and Rita. Roddy waved nervously.

"Welcome to the end of the world!" shouted someone.

"This is Roddy St. James and Rita Malone from Ratropolis," went on Algernon. "I think you'll be interested to hear what they've got to say. It's possible, my friends, that we might not be stuck here much longer!"

Algernon stepped back and nodded to Rita, who stepped forward.

"My father is the new mayor of Ratropolis," she said. "Now listen, and listen good."

She explained the plan. To Roddy's surprise, the reaction was rather muted, but he saw from the expressions on the assembled faces that this was more out of disbelief than anything else.

"So, what do you reckon?" finished Rita.

"I reckon you're bonkers, missy!" said the interjector. He stood up. It was a male rat, broad-shouldered and barrel-chested and clearly pushing middle-age slightly harder than it was pushing back.

"You've something to say, Big Jack?" said Algernon.

"I have," said Big Jack, crossing his tattooed arms. "Now, I'm no fan of this life here. But this is crazy talk! Flushing us all away, into sewers we don't know? It's a death sentence, that's what it is, a death sentence!"

"Sit down, Jack, you're being an ass," said someone else. Roddy recognised the old cotton-seller.

"Watch your language, Elsie, there might be Americans around," said Algernon mildly.

Jack glowered. "All I'm saying is that these two breeze in here easy as easy, and start thinking they can tell us what to do! All right, they want to go home. We all want that! But they're asking us to risk everything!"

"If it doesn't work, the town'll be destroyed," said someone from the back. Jack nodded. "Right! And we'll be dead!"

"You're talking a lot, Jack," said the cotton-seller. "But not much sense is coming out. You think we'd be risking our lives to try their plan?" The old woman stood up and stared over the crowd. "You're damned right we'd be risking them! But what would we be doing if we stayed here? That wouldn't be _risking_ them, that'd be throwing them away! I've lived in this weir since I was a wain, and I'll not be sorry to get out of it, even if it is dangerous!"

"Easy for you to say, Elsie," said a younger woman, who was holding a baby in her arms. "What about those of us with more than five minutes left to live?"

Elsie glared. "I'd expected better from you, Cally! Look at what you're holding there. Look at young Arthur. What kind of life is he going to have if we stay here? The whole town's _dying_, why can't you people see that!"

"We've always survived," replied Big Jack.

"You mean _you've_ always survived," snapped Elsie. "What happened to all the others like you, eh? They're gone, that's what! They left to try to find a way home for us all, and what did you do? Sat around here saying exactly what you've said tonight! You ought to be ashamed of yourself, Big Jack! Everyone knows what you done and what happened!"

A silence fell over the crowd. It was broken at length by a small voice.

"I reckon we ought to go for it."

Denny was standing on his pew. Elsie smiled down at him.

"You're just like your old man, Denny. I knew it ran in the family."

Denny looked around. "I reckon we ought to go for it. What other chance have we got? My parents wouldn't have wanted us to turn these two away! They'd have said we should try!"

"Yes, they would, young one." Algernon nodded. He raised his head. "I say we put it to the vote. All those in favour of trying the plan?"

He raised his hand. Denny and Elsie raised theirs. One by one, the entire assembly raised theirs. Big Jack's was the last and slowest to go up.

"All those against?"

There was silence. Big Jack coughed. "You got your vote, priest. So I'll go along with that, 'cause you'll need me. But how do we get all these people out of here? There's no boat big enough for all of us."

"Maybe not yet," said Rita. "Maybe not a boat either. But it strikes me that there's one thing around here big enough for everyone."

As the crowd watched, she walked over to the side and banged her knuckles on the metal wall of the church.

"How watertight d'you think this is?"


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five: Litter Traps **

The crowd dispersed slowly, chatter filling the air as they went.

"That went better than I expected," commented Roddy.

"Yeah, I guess it did…" said Rita.

Roddy looked at her and patted her shoulder. "And you were brilliant, with that idea about using the church itself! Nobody else could have thought of that, Rita."

Rita accepted the compliment with barely a nod. She was looking over to where Algernon was talking to Big Jack.

"I wonder what his story is," Roddy went on. "Elsie certainly didn't seem to like him very much."

Big Jack shook Algernon's hand and left. He paused and nodded to Rita and Roddy as he departed. Algernon came over and joined them.

"You certainly delivered an impressive performance, Rita," he said. "That was a good idea, using this place."

"Sorry about that," Rita said. "I probably should have asked you if that was okay before suggesting it."

"Oh, not to worry." Algernon waved a hand. "I rather like it. The community is looking to my church for a vessel of salvation. The metaphor alone knocks me down. I think you changed a lot of minds tonight."

"Not all of them," said Rita, nodding pointedly in the direction of Big Jack's exit.

"Don't mind him," said Algernon. "You heard him. He'll help. He may not like it, but he doesn't go back on his word. Mostly."

"Mostly?" Roddy looked up. "Oh, that's comforting. What was it that Elsie was talking about before?"

Algernon sighed. "That's a bit of a story."

"We've got time," said Rita. "I like to know who I'm working with."

The priest nodded sadly. "Big Jack came here with nine or ten others. They were the crew of a salvage barge. They were the best mariners we had. All of the others left, one by one, to find a way back to Ratropolis. Of course, we never heard anything from them again. Big Jack was the only one who didn't try."

"Why not?"

Algernon shrugged. "Eventually there were only two of the crew here. Big Jack, and the old captain. The captain had settled down here, married and had a child. That was Denny. Anyway, the captain resolved that he'd go off as well to try to find his crew, or at least what had happened to them. His wife wouldn't agree to stay behind so she insisted on going as well. Big Jack was meant to go with them."

"But he didn't?" said Roddy.

Algernon shook his head. "At the last minute. Literally standing on the dockside. He just flat refused to get on the _Mudlark_- that was the old barge, you see. Said nothing good ever happened on that boat. Denny was supposed to have gone with his parents, but he was a tearaway even then. He was too young to know what was being attempted so he was playing hide and seek or something. By the time he was found, the _Mudlark_ had already sailed."

"So that's what Elsie meant?" asked Roddy.

"Yes. The captain and his wife were a popular couple. A lot of people blamed Big Jack for letting them go. Of course, nothing would have changed if he had gone. Denny would still have been left here alone. The _Mudlark_ would never have returned anyway. None of them ever do." Algernon smiled sadly.

"Are you sure we can trust Jack?" Roddy looked worried.

Algernon nodded. "Oh, yes. He's still the best sailor in town, whatever faults he might have. He knows what has to be done. Which reminds me, you'll need to meet him tomorrow morning."

"Why?"

"You'll need to survey the main tunnel, won't you?" Algernon suggested.

Roddy shrugged. "Well, it can't do any harm. We might as well know where we're going for once, right, Rita?"

Rita nodded distractedly. Roddy watched her for a moment.

"We'd better head off, then," he said. "Thanks, Algernon."

"We'll be the ones thanking you if this works," said Algernon. "Good night to you both."

* * *

Rita was unusually quiet on the way back to the _Jammy Dodger II_. She remained so even when preparing for bed.

"We'd better get some sleep," said Roddy. "It sounds like tomorrow could be a busy day."

"Yes, it does," said Rita, absently. She lay down on the mattress.

"A good thing Algernon was all right about turning his church into a boat, too,"

"Yes, it was," said Rita. Roddy sat on the edge of the bed and raised an eyebrow.

"Even so, it'll be quite the task making it seaworthy."

"Yes, it will be."

Roddy rolled his eyes.

"What with the walrus and everything," he said.

"Yes, I know." Rita paused and frowned. "Hang on, what walrus?"

Roddy shook his head. "Just checking that you were paying attention. Are you all right, Rita? You're tense. Well, more than usually." Roddy touched a hand to her back as he lay down next to her. Rita sighed.

"Sorry, Roddy. Just…a lot on my mind."

"Your father's plan isn't so bad," said Roddy. "Even I'm starting to come around to it."

"That's not what worries me," Rita sighed again. "I trust my father with my life."

"So what's the problem?" Roddy propped himself up on an elbow to look at her. Rita half-turned onto her back and stared up at the roof of the weir, her green eyes full of shadows.

"The fact that everyone in this town just trusted me with theirs. I'm no stranger to long-shots and one-in-a-million chances, but I've never had to risk anyone else's life along with mine."

"Present company excepted, I assume," Roddy smiled.

"Present company always excepted," said Rita. "But that's different. I know you and I trust you. I don't know these people."

Roddy looked at Rita's face and stroked her hair. That explained it. Letting people down was probably the only real fear Rita had. Until now, that had meant her family. Their future was secured, but now there was another group of people relying on her. Roddy's heart went out to her. So strong and caring…maybe too much.

"I think I understand," said Roddy quietly. "Try not to worry. Remember that we haven't forced anyone into this. Don't try to carry the burden all by yourself. I'm here as well, you know."

Rita smiled for the first time and touched Roddy's cheek.

"I know. And I'm very glad of it."

Roddy smiled with relief and kissed her. "You've never let me down, and I don't think you're about to start now. Sleep well."

"Good night, Roddy." Rita rolled back onto her side and let Roddy put an arm around her, trying to take comfort from his presence and avoid thinking about the events that she had just set in motion…

* * *

Bruce One drove in the last screw and stepped back to look at his handiwork. The Toad's old staple gun had been installed on a ring in the rear seat of the _Flying Malone_, enabling it to be turned to face any direction. The other Bruce, who was in the new turret, nodded with satisfaction and stood up. He leant casually on the trigger and the gun fired a short volley. Bruce looked around in surprise.

"Whoops! Sorry, mate. Mate? Bruce?"

"Down here, Bruce."

Bruce peered over the edge. Number Two Bruce was lying on the floor. His hat was now stapled to the wall behind him. Number One Bruce grinned sheepishly.

"Eheh…sorry, mate. You dead?"

"Not half, Bruce." Bruce Two stood up and dusted himself down. "I think we can call that a successful weapons test."

Jasper wandered into the hangar and took in the scene. He shook his head silently.

"I leave you two alone for five minutes and look what happens," he said.

Mr Malone came to join him. "What happened?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary," said Jasper airily. "Do you need anything, your worship?"

"My daughter back," sighed Mr Malone. "But I'll settle for an explanation."

Jasper grinned. "I fly this thing out to the Barrier. Bruce and Bruce provide the defence if any of Pegleg's seabirds try to have a go at us. You parachute on to the Barrier, disable one of the gates, and we pick you up again and come back here. Of course, you'll need to have the city floodgate open 'cause that's the way they'll be coming in. How are you doing for sandbags?"

"We should have enough," said Mr Malone. "Harold and Sid have been working overtime to get them ready. Hang on a moment, what was that about us parachuting in?"

"_You_ parachuting in," corrected Jasper. "It's the only way. I can't land this thing if there's seabirds nosing about. Don't worry, it's all under control." He held up a parachute pack and grinned again.

Mr Malone stared at it and sighed. "Oh, all right…but you'd better be sure this works."

* * *

The sound of sawing was already echoing across the weir when Roddy and Rita made their way towards the concrete spill barrier. The town hadn't wasted any time in starting preparations. The church was already half-hidden with scaffolding and the sound of hammering could be heard from inside as workers located and sealed rust holes.

Big Jack was waiting for them at the base of the concrete barrier, looking somewhat impatient. He had a large coil of rope around one shoulder and a crossbow slung over the other.

"I was wondering when you'd turn up," he said.

"Good morning to you, too," said Rita. "Now, what are we doing here again?"

Big Jack gestured to a ladder that ran up to the top of the barrier. "You'll have to scout a little way down the tunnel to figure out where you'll be leading us."

"Home," said Roddy. "What's the problem?"

"The problem," said Big Jack, "Is that this is a weir. Upstream and downstream of every weir in the London sewers, there's-"

"Litter traps," finished Rita, catching on. "Yes, I know. So what?"

"It's probably worth your while to check out the downstream trap," said Big Jack. "We're going to be going that way, if your plan works. And I for one don't like the idea of tearing the bottom out of that barrel." He jerked a thumb at the distant church. "If the trap is too high, this can't be done. Simple."

Rita looked up the ladder. "Yeah, all right. Fine. Come on, Roddy." She started up the ladder. Roddy and Jack followed her, the former trying not to dwell on every creak of the rickety frame. At the top of the barrier, they paused and looked down. Roddy felt his heart sink as he peered down the nearly-sheer drop down the face of the spillway and into the dark, dingy main trunk tunnel. Big Jack uncoiled the rope from his shoulders and tossed one end of it into the abyss.

"I'll be here when you get back. Two tugs on the rope and I'll haul you back up."

"You're staying here, then?" said Rita, narrowing her eyes.

"Unless either one of you thinks you're strong enough to pull _me_ up here," said Big Jack. Rita eyed the large, heavily-built mariner and admitted that he had a point. The ladder rattled behind them. Algernon hauled himself to the top rung.

"Gosh…that's…rather high, isn't it? Good morning everyone."

"Morning, Algy," said Rita. "What are you doing here?"

"Just came…to give my blessings…" Algernon paused to catch his breath. "And to give you these, which are probably more useful."

He passed over a wrapped package. Roddy opened it and found six fresh matches.

"Usually use them for the church candles," explained Algernon. "But since we're not going to be doing that any more, I thought you might need them."

Rita took them. "Thanks. These'll be a great help."

Algernon smiled. "Then I'll wish you the best of luck." He began making his way back down the long ladder. Big Jack hammered a spike into the floor and attached the rope to it. Rita tested it gingerly.

"Well, come on, Roddy. The faster we get down there the faster we'll get back."

"I wouldn't want to get there too fast," said Roddy. "It's a long way down." He looked over the edge and swallowed nervously. It certainly was. Rita, fearless as she was, had already begun walking slowly backward, keeping her feet firmly braced against the barrier face. Roddy sighed and followed her. The rope which had seemed so strong suddenly felt wholly inadequate. His hands threatened to slip every time he moved them. He risked a glance behind him and wished he hadn't. The tunnel floor hadn't got any closer. Rita seemed a long way below him. She paused and looked up, smiling encouragingly.

"You're doing fine, Roddy, don't worry! Besides, I'm here to catch you if you fall."

"Oh, good," Roddy redoubled his grip on the rope. And there was me worried that you didn't have a backup plan. How much further is it, exactly?"

"Ignorance is bliss, Roddy," said Rita.

"Pardon?"

"I said, ignorance is bliss. I'd tell you why, but you're better off not knowing."

Roddy considered this. "Are you sure that now is the best time to try to make me laugh?"

"Buck up, Roddy. We're nearly there." Rita grinned and began working her way down again. Roddy just kept going, the sling of matches around his shoulder seeming to double in weight with every step. He heard a small splash from below.

"I'm down, Roddy!" Rita called.

He made no reply and took another step. The concrete under his foot crumbled and he slipped off the wall. There was a moment of weightlessness before he fell, hanging from the rope by one hand. The shock was too much and his fingers slipped from the rope. He fell backwards, knowing that there was nothing to do that would save him.

Rita caught him easily in her arms.

"See? Told you."

"What?" Roddy blinked at her in surprise and looked up. The damaged concrete that had caused his fall had been just above the last course of brickwork, no more than a foot or so above the bottom.

"Oh…right. Thank you."

"And you didn't take me seriously before," Rita shook her head. "Shame on you."

"Roddy coughed with embarrassment. "Yes, well. Can you put me down now or would you like to carry me further?"

Rita lowered him gently. The trickle of water came up over his ankles. Roddy took a moment to regain his breath and then drew a match from his sling and struck it on the wall. It flared up, casting a sulphurous yellow light around them as they walked.

"Explain to me what we're doing again?" he said.

"Looking for the downstream litter trap," said Rita. "Things get washed into weirs and can't be removed without it flooding."

"Witness Exhibits A and B here," said Roddy.

"Precisely," Rita nodded. "Upstream and downstream of every weir is a metal grate built into the walls and floor of the sewer. That's there to catch all the rubbish when the weir overflows. It's the only way to make sure the sewers don't all get clogged up during floods."

"So how do we get past it?"

"We hope that it isn't too high and that Jasper managed to flood the weir very well." Rita peered into the gloom. "Is it just me or can you hear something?"

Roddy listened. "No, no, nothing out of the ordinary. Present company excepted, of course."

Rita smiled. "That was almost funny, Roddy. You must be relaxing."

Roddy sighed. "The sooner we're done the better. How far downstream is the trap likely to be?"

"Not too far." Rita took the matchstick torch from him. "But we'll have to move fast to get there and back before we run out of matches."

The one in her hand flickered out. She reached for one of her own and lit it. Up ahead, a dark, mountainous shadow loomed out of the darkness. The water got slightly deeper and the distinctive smell of damp rubbish filled the air. Roddy wrinkled his nose in distaste.

"Well, this looks like it." Rita stared up. "Nobody's cleaned this out for a while, I'll tell you that."

The rubbish was piled high above them, forming its own dam. Rita stared at it, trying to guess the height.

"It isn't too bad. We'll probably be able to clear this easily. Hold the light, please."

She passed the torch to Roddy and began clambering up the flank of the pile.

"Hold on, where are you off to?" Roddy followed her awkwardly.

"No better way to figure out how high this is than to climb it," Rita grinned down at him. "Hang on, what's this?"

"A note saying how high it is?" suggested Roddy.

"No such luck, Roddy, I'm sorry." Rita clambered up over the object. It was long, wide and shallow, forming a distinct ledge in the pile. Roddy followed her over the edge. The match burnt his fingers and he dropped it with a whimper.

"Wood underfoot," said Rita. "If I didn't know better I'd say this was a boat or something."

Roddy struck their third match and saw that she was right. Most of the deck was covered with debris, but it was a boat, perched halfway up the pile of rubbish. A name had been carved into the railing. It was the _Mudlark_.

"Oh, dear…" Roddy joined Rita. "Maybe we shouldn't be here…"

Rita looked around and saw a hatch in the deck. "We'd better see what there is. Maybe we can salvage something for Denny."

She hauled on the hatch. It had been locked shut, but the rotten wood gave way to her strength and opened. Roddy squinted into the gloom of the old barge's hold.

"Here goes nothing," muttered Rita, dropping into the depths. Roddy followed her, heart in his mouth.

* * *

Down below the deck, the _Mudlark_ was cavernous and dingy. Mould had entered through every crack and the hull bottom had rotted away completely in some place. Rita led them forward, picking her way around the rubbish.

"Maybe there's nothing here after all…" she said.

A strangely-shaped shadow caught Roddy's attention. He moved the torch to cast light into the corner and felt sick.

"Rita? There's something here all right…"

Rita joined him. There were two rat skeletons in the corner, huddled against each other in a last embrace. A spear, a shank of sharpened metal, lay beside them.

"It must be Denny's parents…" said Rita. "Oh, no…what could have happened here?"

Roddy stared around them. There were scratch marks on the surface. The tip of the spear was curiously curled as if it had been driven into something very hard with great force. He began to feel uneasy.

"I think we should go," he said quietly. "Or should we get Algernon? Last rites, or something?"

Rita shook her head. "Too late for that."

There was a noise from up on deck. Roddy started and stared up as horrible ideas began forming in his mind.

"Rita? You know how Big Jack had that crossbow?"

"Yes?"

"And that there's a used spear down here? And wasn't that hatch shut?"

"Yes, of course it was." Rita frowned. "Roddy, what's wrong?"

"It was shut from the _inside_," said Roddy. "Which begs the question…"

"…what's outside that they wanted to keep there?" Rita's eyes widened. The match chose that moment to burn out, and Roddy struck the last of his. Rita had already picked up the spear and was clambering out of the hatch. Roddy followed. On deck, the source of the noise was clear. A carpet of cockroaches was flooding down the pile of rubbish, the hundreds of legs making a rustling sound as they came.

"Scavengers! Get down!" Rita pushed Roddy towards the edge. He needed no encouragement and slipped and slid his way to the floor. Rita followed. She looked up and hissed between her teeth. The cockroaches were still bearing down on them, a carpet of shining armour in the yellow torchlight. Rita watched them bearing down on them. Normally cockroaches weren't a problem- indeed they were a common pet for the well-to-do- but the only difference between a household pet and a wild animal is an accident of birth.

"Run?" she suggested.

They set off, splashing through the water even as the leading insects reached the bottom of the pile and began swarming along the walls. Roddy risked looking back and tripped, falling headlong into the water. The match hissed and went out, plunging them into stygian darkness. Rita ran back and hauled him, coughing, to his feet. She blinked furiously to gain her night vision.

"Come on!" She took his hand and set off. Roddy was hard-pressed to keep up with her swift pace, especially in the dark, but they couldn't risk stopping to light another match. Before he knew it, Rita was shoving the rope into his hands. Roddy tugged on it twice.

"Gotcha!" shouted Big Jack, from high above. He began pulling hard, and Roddy was swept up. His shoulders strained as he looked back down. The carpet of insects was almost the bottom of the rope.

"Rita!"

She had turned to face the first of the cockroaches, flipping it into its back and impaling it on the spear with a sickening crunch of chitin. She grabbed the end of the rope and began climbing. Roddy breathed a sigh of relief. Big Jack's strong hand seized his wrist and pulled him up over the top.

"Thank…you…" he panted.

"Roddy!"

His heart stopped. Rita was still coming up. He stared over the edge and saw that she had a problem. A second cockroach had managed to catch the trailing rope and had attached itself to her back and she was struggling to fight it off with one hand. Its serrated legs bit into her ribs through her jumper and the creature's long antennae flickered whip-like around her head as it tried to climb up her body.

"Take the line, and hold it if you care about her!" Big Jack passed Roddy the rope. He braced himself and took the strain and watched as Big Jack unslung the crossbow. He gulped and took another look at Rita. She kicked away from the wall with both legs and swung back heavily, hoping to crush the insect between her body and the concrete face. The shock of the impact nearly took the rope from Roddy's hands and he heard Rita cry out in pain.

"Hold still!" shouted Big Jack, aiming. Rita looked up frantically and saw the weapon being aimed in her direction.

"I hope you know what you're doing!" she shouted, halting her swing and bracing herself.

"So do I!" shouted Big Jack. "Eat this!"

There was a _click_ as he fired. The bolt took the insect in the flank, tearing it off Rita and sending it falling towards the water below. Nodding with satisfaction, Jack helped pull Rita over the top.

"Are you all right?" Roddy took her in his arms.

Rita winced. "Yeah…fine. Arm hurts a bit though." She touched her right arm and bit back a yelp of pain. She fingered a hole in her jumper where the cockroach's spiny legs had torn the stitching. "I think I might have done something a bit stupid back there."

Roddy took the matches off her and used the sling for her arm. "Is that better?"

She smiled bravely. "You've got the healing hands, all right," she said.

Roddy smiled back with relief. He turned to Big Jack. "Thank you. For saving her."

The big rat shouldered the crossbow. "Nothin' to thank me for. You're lucky it worked. So how was it? Is the trap low enough?"

Rita nodded. "If we can get enough water to flood this place, we'll be over it with room to spare."

Big Jack nodded. "Good. Then I'll get back and see how they're getting on at the church." He started down the ladder.

"Oh, and by the way, we found-" Roddy began. Rita waved him into silence.

"-nothing," he finished. "We didn't find anything."

He sighed and looked at Rita again. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"I'll be fine." Rita turned away and paused. "Although…I might need a bit of help with the ladder."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six: The Thames Barrier**

Rita sat in the engine room of the _Jammy Dodger II_, wearing one of Roddy's shirts and trying to stitch closed the tears in her green jumper with her one good arm. Roddy was applying an antiseptic cream to the cuts on her back and trying not to inhale the vapours.

"Are you sure this stuff works?" he said, trying to keep as much of the viscous grey substance off her fur as possible in case it stuck.

"Of course I'm sure," said Rita. "It's my grandmother's own recipe."

Roddy sniffed his fingers and wished he hadn't. "Well, if I was a germ, it'd scare the daylights out of me…"

Rita chuckled. "Mum's going to kill me for this. It took her a long time to find the material for this jumper." She bit off the string with her teeth. "How's that look to you?"

Roddy looked over her shoulder. Nobody could say that they didn't notice the repairs, but at least the holes were sealed.

"I think that's as good as it'll get," he said. "Of course, if you let me try it with both my hands…"

Rita looked at him sceptically. "You can sew?"

"I'm always willing to learn from an expert," said Roddy. "Of course, that means I'd have to speak to someone else."

Rita grinned. "Thanks for that." She stood up, unbuttoning the borrowed shirt, and moved to shrug it off her shoulders. Roddy twitched and whirled away.

"What are you doing?" asked Rita, laughing.

"Something called propriety," said Roddy defensively, his back to her. "I realise that you tend to keep digging when you hit the bottom of the barrel, but…"

"Oh, come on! Like you haven't seen what there is to see. Besides, I'll need to help to get dressed with this arm."

Roddy sighed and helped her into the jumper. He re-tied the sling over the shoulder and picked up the jar of antiseptic.

"Anywhere in particular this belongs or can I tip it into the fuel tank with the other noxious chemicals?"

"Sure, or you could keep it and use it to improve the flavour of whatever you cook next," Rita winked. "Just put it in that cupboard there. No, there."

Roddy closed the door and followed Rita up on deck. The townspeople had made good progress and were preparing to roll the church into the lake. A crazed tangle of rope had been set up and gangs were hauling on great levers.

"Do you really think that'll work?" asked Roddy.

"It's going to have to," replied Rita. "Come on, let's go and see if we can lend a hand."

Roddy looked at her injured arm and smiled. "_A _hand is right in your case."

* * *

Algernon was standing with one of the hauling teams. The ropes had been attached to long wooden logs which had been inserted under the side of the barrel, levering it out of the ground. He waved as Roddy and Rita approached. 

"Hello! I heard about your escape before. I hope you don't always cut things so fine."

"Oh, no," said Rita. "Sometimes we cut them much finer."

"Pardon?" Algernon frowned.

Roddy rolled his eyes and took hold of the rope. Big Jack was leading one of the other teams.

"Everybody ready?" he shouted. "All right! Here we go! One, two three!"

They heaved. The ropes creaked and the wood made horrible splintering sounds, but the barrel did indeed lift up slightly.

"One, two three!"

The noises grew louder. Roddy gritted his teeth as he strained.

"It's lifting!" shouted Rita encouragingly. Denny appeared beside her.

"Hope there's nobody standing in front of it when it goes," he commented brightly.

Rita looked down at the young rat and remembered what she and Roddy had found aboard the _Mudlark_.

"One, two, three!" Big Jack roared. One of the logs split and fell, the team that had been pulling on it scattering as the wood clattered down around them.

"Hold the strain!" shouted Algernon. "Don't let it go! Keep trying!"

They dug their feet into the ground and braced. Rita watched as Archimedes won the battle against Isaac Newton, and the enormous barrel lifted free of its bed. It teetered for a moment or two, unsure of what happened next, before it rolled down the slope towards the lake. It crashed off one or two abandoned dockside buildings before landing with an almighty splash that sent great ripples bouncing across the lake. The _Jammy Dodger II_ rocked and banged against the jetty as the town cheered. Roddy helped up Algernon and grinned to Rita.

"Piece of cake," he said.

Algernon laughed. "Is that right, Jack?"

Big Jack nodded. "Aye, we just need to fit her with those outriggers and she'll be ready to go."

"Outriggers?" said Roddy.

"It'll roll something awful if it doesn't have them," said Big Jack. "I'll not be able to hold her steady even if you're towing us."

Rita looked down at the great barrel, floating in the shallows of the lake. One more step closer to escape- if her father was successful. Big Jack cast a glance at her.

"Speaking of which, I guess you've got a back up plan, since you're out of action? Someone's got to pilot your tub."

Rita looked at her arm in its sling ruefully. "Too right, they do. But don't worry. I'm sure Roddy can handle it."

"Pardon?" Roddy stared.

"You're the only other person who knows how to handle the _Dodger_," pointed out Rita, smiling encouragingly.

Roddy made no reply.

"Does he normally look like that?" asked Big Jack, conversationally.

"Oh, yes," said Rita briskly. "That's his game face."

"And is it normally that colour?"

"That's his game colour."

There was a thump. Algernon looked down, concerned.

"And…does he normally faint like that?"

"That's his game fainting." Rita helped Roddy to his feet. "Come on, tiger, stand to."

Roddy found his voice again. "Me? Are you…I mean, do you trust…I mean…me?"

"There's nobody else, Roddy," said Rita. She lowered her voice to a whisper the others couldn't overhear. "And there's nobody else I'd rather trust."

Roddy smiled nervously. This wasn't a burden he was prepared for, but the position was inarguable.

"Well…all right. Since I have to. But make sure you're there with me."

"I'll be with you, Roddy. I promise." Rita hugged him.

"And I'll be right behind you," said Big Jack.

Roddy nodded and sighed. "I guess it's down to Mr Malone now."

* * *

The _Flying Malone_ levelled out over Woolwich Reach. Jasper lifted his goggles and pointed over the side. 

"There it is! The Thames Barrier, just as promised!"

Mr Malone peered down. The line of the Barrier's piers lay across the Thames River like a fleet of silver ships in line abreast. Between them the great gates had been raised to ward off the King Tide that was coming up the estuary.

"Looks a bit like the Sydney Opera House, doesn't it, Bruce?" said Bruce One.

Bruce Two squinted. "Like the Sydney Opera House made in tinfoil, Bruce."

"You two shouldn't be looking at that!" shouted Jasper. "Minds on the job!"

Bruce One saluted and turned back, picking up his telescope and panning it around, looking for the rogue seabirds that would have been following the tidal surge inland. Bruce Two wound the staple gun around and put his eye to the crosshairs.

"Ready, Mr Mayor?" Jasper grinned.

Mr Malone swallowed nervously. He tightened the straps of his parachute around his shoulders and nodded.

"Then here we go! Break right!" Jasper pointed the nose of the plane down and to starboard, bringing it in a sweeping arc over the river.

"We've got to go downstream a bit!" he shouted to Mr Malone. "We'll drop you off when we're flying nice and level!"

"Are you sure you can't land this thing instead?" asked Mr Malone.

"No chance! Not if we've got to fend off anything!"

Mr Malone sighed. "All right. Let's do this thing and go home."

"You've got your kit?"

Mr Malone tapped the heavy toolbelt around his waist. "It's a long time since I've had to sabotage anything, Jasper, I don't mind telling you!"

Jasper laughed. "And it's a long time since I've had to save you after sabotaging something, so we'll both just pick it up again as we go along!"

Mr Malone tried to smile, but it didn't work. He wasn't sure whether he was afraid of the drop, the task ahead of him…or what might happen to Rita if he failed. He looked behind them at the silver shapes of the piers and pondered Pegleg's cryptic warnings about an evil inhabiting the Barrier. They couldn't possibly be true, could they? Even Harold, who was usually quick to adhere to anything pessimistic, didn't seem to believe it.

"Here we go!" Jasper patted Mr Malone's shoulder, taking a hand off the controls and allowing the _Flying Malone_ to yaw alarmingly. "Get over the side and hang on!"

Mr Malone clambered out of his seat and over the side. He held on to the lip of the cockpit and braced his feet against a small rail, the wind buffeting his body. Jasper turned the plane back upriver and reduced speed.

"Bandits! Bandits! Bandits!"

Jasper turned. Bruce One was shouting hysterically and pointing. A flock of seagulls had appeared behind them and seemed to have noticed the _Flying Malone_ and its passengers.

"Seagulls!" shouted Jasper. "I hate seagulls! I hope these aren't the ones we ran into before in the Channel Islands!"

"Why not?" shouted Mr Malone.

"Because we _ran into_ them, mainly!"

Bruce Two cranked the staple gun up and put his hand on the trigger.

"A bit closer, mate, and I'll have you good," he muttered. "I hate flipping birds."

Jasper looked ahead of them. The Barrier was approaching fast.

"I'd get ready to go if I were you?" he said.

"I used to be a simple scrap merchant," muttered Mr Malone, shifting his feet on the rail. "Where did I go wrong?"

"Getting married was what done it," said Jasper. "I warned you about that."

There was a staccato rattle from behind them as Bruce Number Two opened fire, the staple gun spitting out hail of silver shots that described an arc through the midst of the seagull flock and breaking their formation. He began turning the gun, following one of the white birds as it tried to dodge the staples.

"Hold fire!" snapped Jasper. "You can't bring 'em down and we'll need those staples for the trip back!"

"Sorry, mate!" Bruce Two ceased fire, but almost immediately had to open up again on a trio of birds which had appeared overhead. One of them dared the rain of metal to dive down on the racing plane, its yellow beak open and sharp. Jasper dropped the nose at the last minute and the gull whistled past them harmlessly, but the moment had been lost. The Thames Barrier passed underneath them. Jasper swore.

"We'll have to come around again from upstream!" he shouted.

"Wouldn't it be safer if I just dropped off and swam?" yelled Mr Malone.

"With these buggers in the air you wouldn't get five yards!" Jasper shook his head. "Hang on, lads, here we go!"

He yanked the nose up violently and it was all Mr Malone could do to hang on to the side. The _Flying Malone_ climbed and began tipping over. The engines spluttered as the carburettors choked or ran dry. For one awful moment it felt as if the plane was just hanging in space, neither rising or falling. Jasper hauled on the stick one last time and the plane rolled over its back and righted itself. The engines roared back into life, emitting puffs of diesel-blue smoke. The half-loop pointed them back at the Barrier, but also at the seabirds. The two Bruces hurriedly aimed the staple gun ahead of them and blazed away, opening up a clear flight path before running out of ammunition.

"Now or never, mate!" shouted Bruce One, opening the gun's magazine and slamming another stick of staples into the mechanism.

"He's right!" yelled Jasper. "On my mark!"

Mr Malone looked down at the approaching barrier.

"Oh, Rita," he whispered. "Please forgive me if this doesn't work…"

"Now!" Jasper gave a thumbs-up. Mr Malone closed his eyes and let go of the plane.

He fell, the rushing wind about him strangely silent after the noise of the _Flying Malone_'s engines. He counted as Jasper had told him and pulled his ripcord tag.

It came off in his hand. Mr Malone stared at it in disbelief.

"You must be joking…"

Bruce looked behind them at the falling figure.

"The chute should be out by now, mate! Something's awry!"

Bruce Two nodded. "Out of our hands, mate! Heads up!"

Bruce One looked up as a seagull swooped and barely cleared their heads. He seized the staple gun and fired a volley at the retreating bird's tail to no apparent effect. Turning the gun, still holding down the trigger, he forced another bird out of its attack run. But they were fast running out of staples. He felt the magazine empty and opened it to allow Bruce Two to reload.

Mr Malone, falling like a rock, realised the problem. The ripcord line had become tangled in a buckle and couldn't extend. He turned his head and bit through the line above the obstruction and then, gripping the frayed ends in his teeth, pulled hard. The parachute unfolded with a rustle and swelled, arresting his fall at the last possible moment. He looked down as he descended towards one of the piers and braced himself for the landing. He hit the ground and rolled, but the fresh wind driven by the tide then picked up the parachute and tried to tug it inland. Mr Malone was lurched off his feet by the pull and struggled to disconnect the parachute pack. Tearing off the last strap, he watched it waft upstream and breathed for the first time in what felt like hours. Then he got to his feet and looked around. The silver walls of the Barrier towered above him, but there was a small maintenance hatch nearby which was open. Mr Malone peered down into the darkness and unslung a small white fairy light from his belt. He flicked it on and looked up into the sky, but the _Flying Malone_ was nowhere in sight. Mr Malone set his jaw and set off into the darkness to rescue his daughter.

* * *

Roddy looked at the _Jammy Dodger II_'s control panel. 

"Could you go through it one more time, please?" he asked.

Rita sighed and pointed to each control as she named it. "Rudder, throttle, transmission, port bow thruster, port stern thruster, starboard bow thruster, starboard stern thruster, drogue, fuel pumps, ballast, headlights. But you _know_ all this, Roddy."

It was Roddy's turn to sigh. "Yes, yes, I know. It's just that I feel better with you reminding me. Even if you can't use them." He sat in the pilot's chair and looked downcast. Rita put her one arm around his shoulders.

"It's not that hard," she said.

"It's just that…this has always been your boat," Roddy said. "I mean, I know I've been on it a lot, but I've always felt that it was yours."

"Then you've been thinking wrong, Roddy. She's _ours_, not mine. She wouldn't even exist without you, or have you forgotten?" Rita smiled at him. "I know I've never thought of the _Dodger_ as mine alone. I mean, for fun, but…not really."

Roddy wasn't smiling back. His shoulders drooped as if he was physically bearing the burden he had unexpectedly had to carry thanks to Rita's injury. Rita knelt beside him and put her head on his shoulder.

"You can do this, Roddy. I know you can. You wouldn't want all my patient hours of teaching you to have gone to waste, do you?"

It was a joke and meant as such. Rita was pleased to see Roddy smile.

"I don't recall patience being much to do with it," he said.

Rita kissed his cheek. "You'll do fine, Roddy. I'm so sorry that this has to fall to you, but for what it's worth, there's nobody else I'd trust more. I know you can do it."

Roddy kissed her back and stood up, looking across the harbour to where the barrel was being fitted out. Sunken boats had been salvaged and anything that could float had been built into two large outriggers, one either side of the battered hull. A street sign, illegible with age, had been attached as a rudder, its lines running to a system of pulleys controlled from a platform set high on the top of the barrel. Big Jack was standing on it, directing the work teams.

"Exciting, isn't it?"

Denny climbed over the rail and stood watching.

"Exciting. Yes. That's the word." Roddy shook his head.

"Would it be all right if I went with you?" Denny looked at Rita shyly. "It's just…I'd feel better that way. Algy's going with you two, isn't he?"

"Yes," said Rita.

"Well, could I stay with him?" The boy shifted his feet and looked hopeful.

Rita smiled and ruffled Denny's hair. "Sure you can, kid."

Denny beamed. "Thanks a million, Ms Malone! I'll go and pack my stuff!" He dropped over the side and disappeared.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" asked Roddy.

Rita put her arm around him again. "Sure I'm sure, Roddy. Algernon and I can keep an eye on him. What's the worst that could happen?"

* * *

The interior of the Barrier pier was filled with the hum of high-voltage machinery and a steady background hiss of hydraulics. Pipes of every thickness and colour covered the walls, causing the few small lights to cast scattered patterns of shadow. Mr Malone crept forwards, his torch in one hand and a scrap of paper in the other. Jasper's handwriting was illegible at the best of times and the darkness wasn't helping. Mr Malone paused and squinted at the diagrams that were supposed to help him. Then he sighed, balled up the paper and tossed it over his shoulder. How hard could it be to just break this thing? 

Mr Malone squeezed through an open door into a quieter corridor and paused to check his bearings. There was an air duct set into the floor nearby, the metal grid lying slightly ajar. Next to it, a single word had been scratched into the floor by a hand as desperate as it was illiterate. Mr Malone stared at it for a while, trying to work out what it could mean.

WIZL

He smiled. Maybe this was something to do with that story Pegleg had told about an evil force inhabiting the barrier. Was that meant to be its name? Mr Malone picked up his torch and set off down the corridor. WIZL. He'd tell Jasper about that when they got back. He was sure his old friend would appreciate it.

It was as he walked that a nasty thought germinated in his mind. He began rolling the word around in his head, trying out different pronunciations.

Wy-zle. Wizzle. Wy-zel. Weezel.

Weasel.

Oh, _no._ Surely not?

Mr Malone had no good memories of the creature once known as the Weasel. The memories he had were old but bitter. He thought about the last time he had confronted the Weasel and shivered. At least then he'd had some company. All of a sudden, Mr Malone felt lonely and endangered.

"Look on the bright side," he muttered to himself. "Maybe he isn't here."

He looked at the scratched letters and hoped so. He continued down the corridor to a door, which he pushed open and squeezed past. It was a small control room, although 'room' was a generous term to apply to something the size of a phone booth. A small glass window was set above the control panel, where it had rusted open. A small ceiling fan hung overhead. Mr Malone looked around and shivered. It reminded him too much of the Toad's lair from which he had tried to flood the city. He smiled at the irony that he was here now to do almost the same thing. He found a bundle of wires which reached the floor from the console and began laboriously mountaineering his way up it, equipment clanking, until he was able to step onto the small control panel. It wasn't especially complicated, but he still consulted Jasper's instructions. Throwing a switch made an LCD screen change from displaying the word 'AUTO' to 'MANUAL'. A klaxon sounded somewhere behind him and Mr Malone flinched, hoping that nobody else had noticed.

"Easy as cake," he muttered. "Piece of pie."

He crept across the controls, carefully stepping around any button which didn't look like it should be pressed, and risking a look out the window as it was ajar. It led into a sheer-sided concrete pit, sparsely lit and with the sound of rushing water far below. According to Jasper's almost-a-diagram, it was some kind of overflow chamber for the Barrier hydraulics. Mr Malone found the control he was looking for. It was evidently not one the designer wished to be pressed. A protective plastic box closed around it and Mr Malone was forced to pry it open and then jump on the red button several times before it clicked into place. The klaxon sounded again, more insistently this time, and the sound of water coming through the open window increased. A screen mounted high on one wall flashed a warning.

_Barrier Status: Open_

That was it. Mission accomplished.  
"I hope this works, Rita," Mr Malone shook his head. "For all our sakes."  
He dropped back to the floor of the control room and back out into the corridor. The rising sound of the water and the raucous bleat of the klaxon were more muted out here.  
"Who are you?" It was a voice barely above a whisper and seeming to come from the shadows themselves. Mr Malone froze and tried to switch on his flashlight again.  
"Who's there?" He looked around nervously. "What's happening?"  
"My questions first." A shadow got up and sauntered towards him, its voice becoming more menacing. "Why have you invaded my realm, little creature?"  
The speaker stepped into the light.  
"The Weasel!"  
"The very same." The creature loomed over Mr Malone, who began backing away. "I recognise you, little creature. From whence did you come?"  
"Nowhere! Nowhere! I'm just here to...to save my daughter!"  
The Weasel smiled patronisingly, sharp teeth glinting. "If your daughter is here, little creature, I'm afraid you've wasted your time."  
"No, no, Rita's not here! She's-" Mr Malone stopped as he realised his mistake. He and Rita had brushed with the Weasel before and had barely escaped.  
"Rita? Rita, Rita Rita, Rita, that sounds familiar." The Weasel's voice lowered again. "And now I'm starting to recognise you, little creature. You caused me a great deal of trouble in the sewers. All those years ago..."  
"There's been a mistake!" Mr Malone looked back to the control room door. He could just make it...if there was a distraction.  
"Oh, yes- yours. You shouldn't have come back. The Weasel does not forget, little creature!" The Weasel snarled. Mr Malone punched the button on his flashlight, which blazed into life. He slung it at the Weasel's head, forcing him to duck and cover his eyes from the light. By the time he recovered, Mr Malone was already ducking through the door into the control room.  
"You can't get away! I'll catch you!" The Weasel crashed through behind him. Mr Malone was hurriedly climbing the wires mounted on the wall, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. The Weasel followed.  
"Not if I can help it!" Mr Malone dropped his empty parachute pack, which wrapped around the Weasel's head. It bought him the time he needed. He scaled the wires almost to the roof and made a daring leap onto the nearest blade of the ceiling fan. It wobbled under him and he tried not to look down.

"You can't get away now, rat!" The Weasel reached the top of the wires and braced himself for the jump.  
"I don't need to," said Mr Malone. "You didn't get me and Rita before. I'll not let you now."  
"Then you die!"  
The Weasel jumped. His weight made the fan rock alarmingly and Mr Malone staggered back around the central mounting as the Weasel recovered and came after him. He ran out onto the tip of one of the other blades, narrowly missing being caught. Mr Malone looked around and saw what he was looking for near the doorway. He jumped out into space and caught hold of the small box, his shoulders screaming in protest. He looked up as the Weasel reached the end of the fan blade.  
"How much longer can you run, little creature?"  
"Long enough," replied Mr Malone. "Long enough." And he switched on the fan.

The Weasel seemed confused as first as to what was happening. The elderly electric motor whined into life, straining with the extra weight, but accelerating quickly as Mr Malone turned up the power. The Weasel was a blur, clinging onto one of the blade and being slid slowly towards the tip by the centrifugal forces.  
"This one's for you, Rita," said Mr Malone. He turned the control to maximum and watched as the Weasel, with a despairing cry, was hurled off the fan and through the open window into the water-filled chamber beyond.

* * *

Mr Malone clambered back into daylight and looked around. The Barrier had definitely been lowered and already the Thames was noticeably higher. The Flying Malone was bobbing about on the water a little way off. The Bruces had rowed a small yellow dinghy over to the pier and were tossing a staple to and fro when Mr Malone joined them.  
"So you made it, mate?" said Bruce Number One.  
"It would seem so." Mr Malone blinked and looked up at the sky. "Where did all the birds go?"  
"When you allowed the tidal surge up the river they all took off after it," said Bruce Number Two. "Most of 'em anyway. The smart ones." He tossed the staple up and down and grinned nastily.  
"All right, your boss-ship," said Bruce One. "Come on, Bruce, let's get him back."  
"Right you are, Bruce," said Bruce Two. "Are you all right, mate?"  
"I'll be a lot better if this works." Mr Malone looked back at the barrier as the Bruces paddled them towards the plane. "A lot better." 


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven: Flushed Away Again**

Roddy's heart was in his mouth as he checked the controls again. Everything was still in order. Behind him, Rita helped Algernon check the cable ties.

"We're all set back here!" she called.

Roddy nodded. "Everyone tie themselves in, then." He picked up a length of rope and tied it around his waist before helping Denny do the same. Thus secured to the railings of the boat, they waited and watched as the water level rose. The rushing of a rapid current could be heard from the other side of the barrier.

"Got any last-minute prayers for us, Algy?" said Rita to Algernon.

The young priest shrugged. "I really, really hope that this works?"

"How about 'forgive them, Lord, for they know not what they do?'" shouted Big Jack from his steering platform atop the barrel.

"Well, I feel a lot better for that," said Roddy. He looked back to where the great barrel floated. Big Jack waved and assorted faces could be seen at the windows cut into the side. The outriggers creaked as the surface of the water rippled. The lake in the weir was rising fast, and the water had already submerged most of the town's docks. As Roddy watched, the main street went under water and houses flooded. Well, they were committed now.

"You should probably start your engines now," said Rita. "Once the water overflows the barrier it'll be too late."

Roddy opened the throttle. The boat wasn't really going anywhere, not while trying to tow the church barrel behind it, but he turned it slightly downrange anyway. Rita joined him and put a comforting hand on his shoulder, lowering her voice.

"Don't worry, Roddy. It's ninety percent instinct. Just relax and do what your reflexes tell you and it'll be all right."

"What about the other ten percent?"

"Oh, half of it's skill, the other half is luck." Rita smiled. "You'll see us right, Roddy. I trust you."

Roddy tried to smile back. "I'm glad one of us does. I've never done anything like this before."

"Neither have I." Rita stroked his shoulder. "Try not to think about it, Roddy."

"Easy for you say," said Roddy. "That comes naturally to you."

Rita chuckled. "You can't be that scared if you're still making jokes."

Roddy grinned and hoped that hid the deep pit of pure terror that had built up inside him. Rita smiled sadly at him and wished she could be of more help to her partner. She kissed him for luck and squeezed his shoulder comfortingly.

"It's at the top!" shouted Denny. "We're going over!"

* * *

Roddy fixed his attention ahead. The weir was overflowing the barrier, and the boat bucked beneath his feet as the torrent caught it and bore it towards the raging waters of the trunk tunnel. He gunned the engines and steered them into the middle of the current, the barrel swinging into position behind the _Jammy Dodger II_ as Big Jack worked the rudder. The steel cables creaked and the stress on them bent the railings slightly. Rita watched them like a hawk. Algernon looked back to his church, kicking up a colossal bow wave with its blunt face as it travelled down the trunk tunnel. 

Roddy watched the tunnel walls flash past and knew they had passed the litter trap. He thought about what they had found there and wondered what had happened to it all with the deluge. If the _Mudlark_ had survived, it would be well ahead of them now. He straightened up the boat and concentrated on the floating debris. Most of it couldn't be avoided, but most of it wasn't a risk either. Scraps of wood bounced off the metal hull of the _Jammy Dodger II_, rebounded and clanged off the barrel behind them. Larger pieces of debris had to be dodged, but the cables screamed their protest with every turn. Sweat ran down Roddy's forehead and his eyes flickered from one possible obstacle to the next, assessing and acting as fast as he could. The tunnel walls moulded into a blur and he shook his head to refocus. The trunk turned to the south and Roddy heard the barrel slam into the wall. Big Jack's cursing could be heard even over the scraping of steel on brickwork and the crunching of the outriggers. Roddy didn't even want to think what was happening inside that improvised vessel, with scores of presumably-terrified people packed in with no way of even seeing if they were going to die. Roddy set his teeth as he brought them back into the current, coaxing the extra power out of the engines with a finesse that would have made Rita proud. A large piece of debris reared out of the water in front of them and he turned to avoid it. It wasn't fast enough and the _Jammy Dodger II _pinballed off it, lurching drunkenly before Roddy brought it back under control. But not fast enough.

There was a scream behind him as Denny lost his balance and went overboard. His rope went taut as it reached its extension, but the current was too strong for the young boy to pull himself back. He was left bobbing along, head just above the surface, between the _Dodger_ and the barrel.

"Denny!" Rita ran to the rail and watched in horror.

"Help!" Denny disappeared for a moment, sucked under by a momentary whirlpool created by the wake. Rita reached a decision and tore the sling from her shoulder.

"Rita! What are you doing?"

"Hold her straight, Roddy!" shouted Rita. She clambered onto the rail and launched herself into the water. Roddy stared as she reached Denny and struggled to take hold of him with her one good arm. Roddy grabbed Algernon by the shoulder and thrust him towards the wheel.

"You heard her!" he ordered. "Stay the course!"

'What?" Algernon took hold of the wheel uncertainly.

"Just keep her pointed down the tunnel!" Roddy ran to the railing. "Rita!"

He took hold of her rope and began pulling. Desperation gave him strength and Rita and Denny drew nearer, swimming frantically.

"Roddy!" Rita reached out a hand to him. Roddy looked at it. It was her wounded arm, her good one was still wrapped tightly around Denny and trying to keep his head above water. There was nothing for it. Roddy reached down, hoping to take hold of her arm above the break.

It didn't work. The boat lurched as his hand closed around her injured forearm. Rita shrieked in agony, a sound that clawed its way into Roddy's heart like fingernails on a blackboard. It was a horrible sound that he was sure would be replayed by his memory on the darker nights of the year, but there was no time for a second attempt. Rita's fingers clamped around his wrist like a vice and he reached over with his other arm, taking Rita by the shoulder and hauling her aboard. Denny collapsed, panting, in the stern.

"Are you all right?"

Denny nodded sadly and brought up a lungful of stormwater. "Fine," he croaked.

Roddy looked back to Rita. She was curled up against the side, clutching her arm and shivering. Her teeth were bared in a rictus of pain and despite her soaked fur Roddy could see the tears running from her eyes.

"Rita?" He touched her shoulder. She was already shaking with shock and there was a bend in her arm where no bend should have been.

"I said…hold…her…straight…Roddy," she hissed. Roddy nodded desperately and ran back to the cockpit where he relieved Algernon.

"See what you can do for her!" he shouted to the priest. Algernon left, kneeling between Rita and Denny. Roddy tried to clear his head and looked up. The tunnel roof had lifted. That could mean only one thing. They had to be getting close to home.

* * *

Mr Malone stood on the edge of the Ratropolis fountain. The water had already overrun the docks and the whole city was knee-deep, disaster only averted by the sandbags packed tight across ground-floor doorways. The _Flying Malone_ hung above the city. 

"Where are they?" he muttered. "We can't take this flooding much longer."

As if to underline the point, one of his new mobile phones drifted past, rotating as it hit a small eddy. Mr Malone might have been bothered by that, but he had more important things to worry about now. He looked up at the Floodgate Control Tower. Sid was a distant figure at the windows, waiting for the signal to shut the gate. Colin waded up to Mr Malone, a bright pink rubber ring around his considerable midriff.

"The, uh, water's getting pretty high, sir."

"I can see that, Col," said Mr Malone.

"Much higher and it'll start overrunning the bags, sir."

"I can see that as well, Col," said Mr Malone. "I've got to give them as much time as possible. Do you see them, Jasper?" He looked up.

Jasper waved from the _Flying Malone_. "Not yet, your worshipfulness!"

Mr Malone returned his gaze to the great trunk tunnel. It was strange looking out that way, normally blocked by the great steel floodgates. Last time they had been opened, the city had nearly been destroyed. He hoped that history wasn't about to repeat itself.

"There they are!" Bruce Two was sitting up and pointing excitedly. "I see 'em!"

Mr Malone looked. Something had just come around the corner was and bearing down on the city at high speed.

"We've got the shut the gates now, sir," said Colin. "Any longer, and-"

"I know, Col." Mr Malone sighed. He raised his arm and brought it down. Up in the control tower, Sid saw the gesture and threw the switch to begin cycling the gates down.

* * *

Roddy was daring to hope again. He could see the city through the tunnel arch ahead- they had made it! But a second look put the fear back into his heart. The floodgate was closing. He stamped on the throttle, only to find it was already wide open. 

"Come on! Move! Move!" He urged the _Jammy Dodger II_ onwards. The gate kept descending as they neared it and raced underneath. There was a crash behind him as the barrel came through, losing one of its outriggers in the process. The city loomed up ahead, its buildings islands in the high water. Roddy slammed the engines into reverse and turned hard to avoid a disastrous collision and breathed a sigh of relief as the keel scraped across the main square and the _Jammy Dodger II_ came to rest alongside the fountain. Mr Malone was standing there and watching with a look of amazement on his face. Roddy was about to say something when a crash of wood and metal brought his attention behind him. The barrel, with its deeper draught, had hit the edge of the city and gone hard aground, shattering masonry as it came to a halt, Big Jack whooping in triumph. The floodgate finally closed and sealed and the water level began falling away as the city began to drain.

Roddy saluted Mr Malone. The mayor shook his head in silent wonder. Algernon walked to the side of the boat and patted the railings as he stared about Ratropolis.

"_Gratias tibi ago_, _domine_," he murmured.

Denny joined him. "Are we there, father?"

"We're there, my son," said Algernon. "We're there at last."

Rita joined Roddy, walking weakly and still shivering from the pain. Roddy put his arm around her waist to steady her.

"See? Wasn't so bad after all," said Rita, her voice barely above a whisper.

"I never doubted myself for a moment," said Roddy.

"Liar," Rita grinned and leaned against him. She looked up and smiled in greeting to her father before finally allowing herself the luxury of passing out.

* * *

Mrs Malone put a pitcher of milk on the table. The living room of the Malone house was quieter than usual, as the mayor had requisitioned it for an impromptu meeting. Algernon and Big Jack were there as were various luminaries of Ratropolis. Denny had turned up, as was his wont, and he had promptly disappeared off again with a group of the Malone children. Their play could be heard through the walls and occasionally intruded into the meeting like a fast-moving tornado. Mr Malone picked up the milk and offered it around. Jasper, who was quietly cadging the spare biscuits, took it and topped up his tea. 

"I'm glad to see you got everyone back all right," said Mr Malone. "I was a bit worried when Rita told me how many of you there were."

"So were we," said Big Jack. "But it looks like I underestimated your girl's talents."

Jasper coughed. "I'd prefer to think of it as a team effort," he said.

"Right," said Algernon. "I hear we've got to thank you for some heroics, your worship!"

Mr Malone waved a hand. "Just doing my best."

"Well, it wouldn't have worked without you," said Algernon. "Or without you, Roddy, we mustn't forget that! It's probably true to say- Denny, will you keep it outside!"  
He glared at the door. Denny had just bowled into the room, followed closely by Shocky.

"Sorry, father!" Denny looked at Algernon pleadingly. "I just asked him about his name!"

"A mistake many have made." Roddy said ruefully.

"I just wanted to show him, dad!" said Shocky, waving the alligator clips. Mr Malone shook his head.

"I've said this before, son, it's not good for visitors."

"_Now_ he says it," muttered Roddy.

"Sorry, dad." Shocky lowered the clips. Denny grinned.

"I don't know what you're happy about, young man," said Algernon, frowning severely. "I think you owe the mayor an apology for disrupting his important meeting."

"Sorry, sir," said Denny sheepishly. They shut the door quietly. Algernon and Mr Malone exchanged long-suffering looks.

"What are we going to do with that one?" said Mr Malone.

"He can look after himself," said Roddy.

"That's the problem," said Algernon. "He'll need watching. I'll do what I can, of course, but still…"

"Is there anyone he could stay with?" asked Mr Malone. "Any relatives here?"

The door opened again.

"Can Denny stay the night, dad? Dad, can he? Can he, dad?" Shocky beamed. Mr Malone looked up to his wife. Mrs Malone smiled and gave him a small nod.

"Sure he can, son," said Mr Malone. "Sure he can."

"That's very kind of you, your worship," said Algernon.

"It'll be good to get him off your hands for a bit," said Mr Malone. He watched Denny playing with his children and smiled at Mrs Malone knowingly. "Just for a bit."

"How's the girl doing?" asked Big Jack.

"She'll be all right," said Mrs Malone. "She's probably woken up by now. I'll just take her up some tea."

Roddy got to his feet with indecent haste. "No, no! Allow me."

Mrs Malone grinned. "I knew you'd look after her, Roddy. Off you go, then."

* * *

Rita was sitting up in bed when Roddy came in with the tea tray. 

"You really don't have to do this," she said. "It's only my arm that's broken." She gestured to her shoulder, which was shrouded in a clinical white bandage and sling. The arm itself was set in fresh plaster and one of Rita's siblings had already starting scrawling graffiti on it.

"Yes, and that's partly my fault," said Roddy. "Sugar with your tea?"

"You know how I like my tea," smiled Rita. "And it's not your fault. You did what you had to do. You got us home. That was very good piloting, by the way, I don't think I congratulated you on that."

Roddy passed her a steaming mug.

"Which means," Rita went on, "You can stop playing Florence Nightingale now."

"What if I said I was enjoying it?" Roddy grinned and poured himself some tea. "You scared the daylights out of me back then."

"Someone had to go in," said Rita, shrugging. "And Algernon wasn't exactly dressed for it, and you're not the strongest swimmer I know."

Roddy blushed. "Still…it surprised me that you'd do something so risky to save Denny. He could probably have been let go. Big Jack would have picked him up easily enough."

"Yeah…but…" Rita sighed, remembering the feeling of rushing water about her body. Not unlike a situation she'd once been in. "There should always be someone ready to step in. For me, it's always been my parents. It was dad who saved me when I went in as a child. I didn't want to let Denny go without. His parents might not be here, but someone had to do something. That's what parents do."

Roddy raised an eyebrow. "Rita Malone, are you really talking about parenthood?"

Rita raised her own eyebrow. "So what if I am, Roddy St. James?"

"Well, I've just never thought of you as…well…the maternal type." He shrugged.

"I'm sure there's a lot you've never thought of," Rita grinned at him mischievously. "And what makes you think I wouldn't be the 'maternal type'?"

Roddy smiled nervously. "Er…well, you just…I mean, you and children…you don't really seem like you'd go together well…"

"I've looked after my brothers and sisters for years, Roddy. What makes you think I don't like kids?"

"It's not so much that I didn't think you liked children, Rita," Roddy's smile widened uneasily. "It's more that I didn't think you…well…"

"You don't think I want them?" Rita finished the sentence.

Roddy conceded. "Well, you've never really mentioned...anything...and I know your mother's always on at us about grandchildren but whenever she does you get that look on your face that you get whenever you don't want to talk about something."

She reached over and gently took his hand. "And why exactly has made you think that I don't want to have children, Roddy?"

Roddy froze and looked from their touching hands to her shining eyes, trying to think what to say. Then she burst out laughing.

"Oh, Roddy, if you could see your face right now!" She wiped her eyes and patted his hand. "I'm only joking, Roddy, don't be scared. I'm not saying _now_ for goodness' sake! Besides, there are one or two things we'd need to do before you and I could start a family."

"I'd probably enjoy at least one of them," said Roddy, sighing. He shook his head and wondered whether to tell Rita what he had actually thought in that moment. That the emotion which had crowded his mind and frozen his face hadn't been fear but…he shivered and wondered at his own feelings.

"Denny'll fit right in," said Rita, apparently oblivious. "Did you see him playing with Shocky and my other siblings? He's right at home."

"If he's anything like you, he'll do fine," said Roddy.

"Yeah, he'll be right." Rita put her cup down. "Maybe one day we'll tell him what we found on the _Mudlark_…"

Roddy shook his head. "I think he already knows, Rita."

Rita nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, you're right."

Roddy smiled and kissed her. "And it isn't often I hear you say that, so I'll quit while I'm ahead. I'll go and help your father shift those sandbags from the front door. Are you sure you'll be all right here?"

Rita rolled her eyes. "What did I say about Florence Nightingale? Of course I'll be all right, Roddy, when am I not?"

Roddy looked pointedly at her arm.

"Oh, shut up." Rita grinned. Roddy stood up.

"And I didn't even have time to say anything," he said, moving towards the door.

"Like you needed to," Rita laughed. "Go on, get lost if you're going."

Roddy gave a theatrical sigh.

"I try to be nice to you and this is what I get. You know, sometimes you really do make things hard on me, Rita."

"Really?" Rita raised a playful eyebrow and looked him up and down with her grin widening. "How many have you got?"

_The End._


End file.
